Knock knock! Why didn't you use the doorbell?

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Roses are red, violets are blue, your face belong in the zoo, don't worry I get there too, not in the cage, just visiting you :)

thumb_up thumb_down -16

You know whats worse than finding a fly in your soup? 9/11

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Did you know that... Billy had a heart attack, it was sad. Now you know!

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why are white people afraid of black people? The holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What do you get if you cross a human and a cow? Arrested.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

How do you get pikachu onto a bus? You can't. Pikachu is a fictional creature and therefore does not exist.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Adam Chebali is awesome

thumb_up thumb_down -16

An Arabic Muslim is on a plane. He's flying to Chicago.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What do you call a white guy with no friends? A white guy with no friends

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why are fish so easy to weigh? Because usually they've been killed, stunned or sedated first.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "That's the ugliest baby that I've ever seen." The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her, "That driver just insulted me!" The man says, "You go right up there and tell him off! Go ahead, I'll hold your monkey for you."

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What's the difference between Elmo and Cookie Monster? One of them doesn't listen to Michelle Obama

thumb_up thumb_down -16

How do you wake up Lady GaGa? Poke her Face.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

How do you torture Helen Keller? You put her on a table and slowly pull her limbs off

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Friends are like potatoes - when you eat them they die.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is both deaf and blind. Driving would be an extremely hazardous action for herself and other nearby drivers.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What's green and frolics in the forest? A flock of cucumbers.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

-Whats this? -Anti-Jokes.. -Theyre not funny

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Knock Knock Who's there? Do you have a minute to talk about our lord and savior Jesus Christ?

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Roses are red. Violets are blue. Some poems rhyme. This one doesn't.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Roses are red, violets are purple.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

An incoming freshman introduces himself to his Ethics professor by saying, "What's up?" To which the professor responds, "You should never end a sentence with a preposition." The freshman, who is both clever and witty, quickly responds to his future Professor, saying: "Professor, I practice linguistic description, such that I observe language objectively in a way that does not adhere strictly to grammatical and syntactic dogma". The professor, surprised by the student's philosophical disposition, engages the student in a highly constructive dialogue about the philosophy of language, from which both the student and teacher learn more about each other and themselves.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

When faced with an impossible question. I like to give, and maybe receive, an impossible, yet endearing, request/answer to the problem. Sex?

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops