What sound does a snail make? Meow....... Think hard and you'll get it

You're always working, why don't you spend some time with your daughter? be a good father. But i already am. We're sleeping together while you work every night.

What did the black guy say after coming home from school? "I just got home from school."

there were three men in a car, Poop, Shut Up, and Manners. They were driving in a truck when poop fell out of the car. Manners went to get him. Shut Up parked somewhere that he wasn't supposed to so the police man came to him. He asked him what his name was and he said "Shut Up" because that was his name. The police man said "Where are your manners?" then Shut Up said,"He went to go scoop up poop".

How do you stop a baby from crawling circles? You nail it's other hand to the floor too

Roses are red Violets are blue Most poems rhyme But this one doesn't.

Why did the Japanese piliot crash into the ship? Because he has motion sickness and puked all over the wind shield making it so he can't see.

Knock Knock! Who's there? Sex! Sex Who? Sex with me. BOOM!

why was the witch in the broom factory? she was recently employed there and is loving her job maing brooms

a charmander decided to take a swim a.w. j.p.

Knock knock Who's there? Chicken Chicken who? I can't believe you're talking to a chicken

How do you confuse a bus driver? Go invisible and throw bananas at him

The early bird gets the worm. The rest of them die of starvation.

Why did the butcher have blood on his hands? He murdered his daughter.

What do you get when you cross a spoon and a fork? A spoon crossed with a fork.

Who lived in a pineapple under the sea?

Have you ever noticed how those little packets of sweetner are really handy to have around when you like your coffee to be sweeter than its default bitterness?

I used to be an adventurer like you, then I took an arrow to the knee and had armor so it deflected off. Then I found out my wife was pregnant.

why are balck people black because they are

-what does burglars afraid of? -cancer.

FAMOUS DUDE:SWAG! Thank you, thank yo- HEY NO FLASH PHOTOGRAPHY, NO YOU CANT HAVE MY-KABOOM AUDIENCE: . . . YAY CLAP CLAP CLAP.

Q: What happened to the monkey when he jumped off the tree. A: He died Q: Why did the second monkey jump off of the tree A: He was attatched to the first monkey Q: Why did the third monkey jump off the tree A: Peer Pressure

Why did the Mr. bunny play the piano? - His wife Lannette was ill, and her last wish before she died was for him to.

What's cute and smokes? A cute person with a nicotine addiction.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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