What do you call a dear with no eyes? no eyed dear what do you call a dear with no head? dead!

a horse is a horse. of course of course....unless its a cow

what smells like diarrhea and looks like diarrhea? diarrhea stupid

Why didn't the little boy wake up today? Because he's dead

A bear eats some honey. I'm not really sure why and I've never seen a bear eat honey in real life so I don't really know if the bear actually ate any.

a blond girl walks into a bar

Why did the polar bear die? Global warming.

Morgan Freeman walks into a bar. Everyone is pleasantly surprised that they are in the presence of a celebrity.

when a friend comes over and says: hey, do you have a bathroom??? NO!!! I shit in my yard!!!!!

So once upon a midnight dreery.... In a galaxy far far away that takes place in the past but resembles a technologically advanced future, an evil sith overlord took an innocent Jedi knight and turned him in a cybernetic killing machine. In the end, he dies

What characterizes a good joke? The lack of a punch line.

What did the orange say to the apple? Nothing, fruits can't talk.

How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

roses are red, violets are blue, my son is gay, f**k my life...

Why did America nuke Japan? Because Japan bombed Pearl Harbor.

What starts with the letter P and ends with 'orn'? Porn....

a man walked into a bar because he needed a part time job to support his family.

how do you confuse a blond? put them in a circle room and tell them to sit in the corner

Hitler and Jews become friends.

What did the Nazi solider receive on his birthday? A bayonet up his ass.

What does an Irishman say to you in the morning? Nothing because you only speak French.

What did one ocean say to the other? Nothing they just waved

Poop

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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