why did the giraffe cross the road? because my dad and his "fishing buddies" are having another "meeting" in the basement. I hear weird noises, and I haven't seen my little sister in weeks, since the last "meeting." Dad said she went to a special camp for little girls. I hear horrible noises.

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Little Timmy walks up to the teacher during class and asks "Can i use the restroom?" The teacher says "I don't know, CAN you?" Little Timmy says "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?"

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You all have Aids

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Yo mamas so fat she is obese

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What's the hardest thing to do while masturbating? Having sex.

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nick and a mexican were in a falling plane.. nick ate the mexican... that is all..

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What's black and white and red all over? A penguin after being attacked by a man with a mace.

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What happens if a Muslim leaves their bag on a bus? They quickly return onto the bus and get it.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a canoe? One is a type of small aquatic craft, and the other is a human being who practices Judaism.

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A man walks into a bar... OW!!!

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breasts

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How many times has Susie fallen off the swing? Not enough.

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Why couldn't Matilda walk to school? Because a dog ripped her legs off.

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Yo mamas so fat she weighs more than other people

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What do you call a lesbian eskimo? The name she was given at birth.

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Hurricane sandy should have been named hurricane snooki because it ruined the jersey shore

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"Hey dude, wanna come with me??" "Sure! Where????" "To the gorcery store, I need to buy a couple of lemons."

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A guy gets murdered, because of the Reco act the whole gang he belongs to goes to jail as well. They cry in their beds

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Lol (wow, I am using that a lot... BAAAD!) Anyway, yeaaaah, you thanked me for being who I am, this rush of happy drugs from the body is totally a sign of taking insult... Funny, I am not much of a endorphin person otherwise.

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What do u call a boomerang that doesnt come back A stick

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An American almost walks into a store when he sees a Jew. The Jew was also about to walk into the store, So the american opens the door for him and says"Jew first."

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My peni s

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What do you get when you mix a baby and chemical waste? A bad smoothie.

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What is black and white and red all over? A black, red and white picture

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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