why did dominic buy a new speaker on holiday because his parents died and his was at home

"Why the long face?" The bartender asked. "I was born with a severe cleft palette and a jaw deformity. The surgery lets me eat and drink but my parents couldn't afford the cosmetic part of the surgery, the scarring got worse as I grew older. Can I have a beer please?" I replied.

Why didn't the boy get his mom anything for her birthday? He was killed by a drunk driver years ago

why did sally fall off the swing cause she had no arms knock knock who's there? not sally

no pen = no studying no studying = bad grades bad grades = no job no job = no money no money = no food no food = death DON'T LOSE YOUR PEN

A homophobic man walks into a bar and the bartender asks: "what can I get for ya?" the man replies: "shut up gaylord"

Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme But this one doesn't

A homeless guy gets done with his daily work. where does he go? nowhere he is homeless...

Your momma is so dumb, she failed the IQ test.

Racial equality.

What's funnier than a dead baby? A dead baby wearing a clown suit.

hard cheese

Roses are red Violets are blue There are other flowers in the world But you wouldn't know it from this poem.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "I have a gambling problem."

Why did priences Dian cross the street? Cause she wasn't wearing a seatbelt!!

How do you find out if your son is ok? Ask him.

how many jews fit in an oven? none, its illegal to put a person in an oven....

My wife came up to me and said, "I want you to make me scream with 2 fingers!" So I poked her in the eyes!

why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

What did the astronaut say to his girlfriend? I have AIDS.

What do you get when you post the same thing a million times? Hate

Why couldn't the driver start his car? Because the driver was a tree

Why was the baby's face red? Because it was bloody.

Why did the girl get run over by a bus? The bus driver was blind.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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