A group of teenage boys put a flaming bag of dog feces on Old Man Howard's doorstep. He came out and demanded that they stop such behavior at once. They did, and the day went on normally.

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Who did you see last night? Nobody, no one wants to see you.

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There are 11 people hanging onto a rope that comes down from an airplane. 10 of them are blonde, and one is a brunette. They all decide that one person should get off because if they don't, the rope will break and everyone will die. No one can decide who should go, so finally the brunette delivers a very touching speech, ending with the words, "I'll get off." The blondes, all moved by the brunette's speech, start clapping. Problem solved.

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Your mother is so poor she doesn't have any money!

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How do black people vote? They go to their polling place, register, then vote for their candidate on election day.

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What do you call a blonde with a Doctorate in Physics? Doctor (Dr).

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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There was a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. They all had different colors of hair.

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What did the no-arm, no-leg, paraplegic orphan with cancer get for christmas? Pregnant.

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Q:Why did the retarded student get called down to the office? A:Because both his parents died in a car accident.

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Q: Whats different about pizza and jewish people? A: Pizzas don't scream in the oven.

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What did Madeline McCann get for Christmas? Nothing she's dead.

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What's the color of a healthy kidney. I have no f***ing idea.

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Q: Why are all black people fast? A: Because the slow ones are in jail.

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Alpine Ibexes climb nearly 90 degree angles to lick salt deposits off mountain sides. They crave that mineral.

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Why did the midget cross the road? He needed to buy a ladder

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Q:why did the man jump of the house A:he did not I threw a frige at him

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What looks like a smiley face no serously what I want to know

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Guitar. Guitar who? Violin.

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what is a chicken answer: chicken

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What's worse than losing a contact Having a bloody stool

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How do you make a baby cry ? Throw a brick at his face

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Why was the boy put on his socks? So he wouldn't get blisters.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops