why did bob fall off the swing Because he got hit by a microwave

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what is almost like Jesus? Jesus

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Whats Brown and Sticky A) a stick

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? He wasn't: 9 was a dick.

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Why did the black girls wear fancy clothes to the mall? Public nudity is considered a crime in many parts of the world. It would be advisable to wear clothes in public areas, so as to avoid being arrested.

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What kind of horse can do a backflip? No kind of horse.

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Guess what? AIDS!

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What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs because disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion).

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A man comes home after a long days work. It is late at night and he gets in bed with his wife who is already asleep. Later that night he gets up for a glass of water and returns to the bed room to see that his wife doesn't appear to be breathing and calls 911. He then realizes that this isn't his house and he leaves.

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How do you teach an old dog a new trick? Answer: You can't

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What did the plane say to the other plane? Boy, those towers fall!

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what's grosser then 1000 babies stapled to a tree?? 1 baby stapled to 1000 trees

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bath tub? 27

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I hated hipsters before hating hipsters was mainstream. Does that make it sound like I have a fixed gear bicycle? Because I don't... I promise... What's a fixed gear bicycle, you ask? You mean you don't know???

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What do you call a black Englishmen? Rodger

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What's green and fuzzy and if it fell out of a tree it could kill you? A pool table

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What's young and not funny? Todays anti-joke writers.

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Did you hear about the new German oven? Seats 40.

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How do you make a lumberjack cry? By murdering his family.

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Billy was curious if gasoline burns, so he decided to...... .... O crap I'm late for Billy's funeral.

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shut up kobe!

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What's worse than a duck with one leg? A nuclear explosion

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Why did the blonde go to business school? She wanted to get into business, and decided that a business degree was a good place to begin.

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If Johnny can hold 7 bottles of Vodka in one hand and 6 cans of beer in the other, what does Johnny have? A drinking problem.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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