A zen master walks up to a hot dog vendor and says, "Make me one with everything." The vendor says, "Sorry, we're out of relish." Then the zen master tells him, "Sir, I don't think you get the joke. As you can see by my long silk robes and fu manchu, I am clearly a zen master. And I have used a pun that would make you think I were asking for enlightenment from a hot dog." The vendor then says, "We don't take too kindly to wise guys here." And then the prick gets up and tosses me into the street!

Wanna hear a clean joke? A little boy took a bath with Bubbles. Wanna hear a dirty joke? Bubbles is the name of the man.

What is worse than getting raped? Getting raped twice.

Well that explains a lot, thank you.

Your Mum Is So Dumb, It Took Her 2 Hours To Watch 60 Minutes.

your mummas so ugley that it looks like it court fire and your family put it out with forkes

Whats funnier than a dead baby tied to a tree? Everything, infant mortality is a very sad thing.

why did the girl fall of the swing someone threw a refrigerator at her

Q: What happened when Paul couldn't decide on Pornhub or Redtube. A: nothing since he doesn't have a d***

What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

A group of blondes rent a car and decide to drive to Disney World. Along the highway, they see a sign reading "Disney World left." They exit the highway, turn left, and enjoy their well-deserved vacation from practicing law.

what tall and looks like a jew?

What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothin. You already told her twice.

Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Because he has no sense of living and no muscles to move.

What do you call a black guy riding a unicycle? A black guy riding a unicycle.

- How breakdance was invented? - A certain black man was trying to stole rims from moving car.

Why did Sally fall off the swing. She had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there Not Sally

Why did the fat kid fall of his bike? The skinny kid pushed him off!

A: Whats black and hangs from my tree in my backyard? B: What? A: Blackberries B: Blackberries grow on bushes

Why are black people afraid of chainsaws. Because they have razor sharp edges and can slice through flesh very easily, posing a potential threat if possessed by a violent person.

why did the asian kid do well on his math test because he studied

Is this the krusty Crab? No you idiot this is a phone!!!!!

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the idiot's house... Knock knock Who's there? The Chincken

A cow and a whale are swimming in the sea when they both realize this is Vietnam and they were really chimps

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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