You have 10 apples and 12 cabbages How many pizzas can you fit on the roof? Purple because aliens don't wear hats.

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What's worse than having a mouth full of molars? A pole through your chest.

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How many jews does it take to change a baby's diper? I don't know my wife will do it.

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What do you call a man with no arms an no legs in the ocean? Bob What do you call the same man on your front porch? Matt What do you call the same man on your wall? Art

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How can you tell if someone's a Vegan? It will probably come up in conversation, usually during the planning phase of a trip to a restaurant.

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what is worse than a joke? an anti-joke.

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What happen? Idk...

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there are two wales chilling at a bar one looks at the other and does a wale call for 2 minutes and the other looks back and say "dude your drunk we gotta go!"

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What do you get when you cross a chicken with an alligator? Go take some acid and find out for yourself

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What's so sad about a bus with mentally handicapped children falling off a cliff? There was one empty seat.

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What have the TV programmes Shameless, The Jeremy Kyle Show and Benidorm all have in common? They are all examples of modern British society

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How come there aren't any Mexicans on Star Trek? The show already had several minority characters, and the producers felt that the addition of a Hispanic actor or actress would have added nothing of value to the series.

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mark lawson likes boys

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A black man comes home from work.

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Pain is temporary. However, the scars from 3rd degree burns are forever.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? His wife and children had just been struck by a moving vehicle traveling at approximately 45 miles per hour trying to cross the same road. He ran across the road to comfort his dying wife and two children as they took their final breaths. The chicken was also not really a chicken but a middle-aged man who had recently been laid off his job and diagnosed wiuth an incureable disease.

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How do you know when your dog is gay? When the dog starts wearing way to many Deep Vs and watches the Oxygen channel with "friends"

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What happens when you have nothing to do and you can't think of a joke? You just type whatever you want and hope to god someone likes it.

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I farted and it smells like rotten ham with melted cottage cheese now dislike this please.

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Why do you put babies in the blender feet first? To hear them scream.

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wake n shake = wake up and masterbate to a picture of drew e mom o.O

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if chuck norris had 5 dollars and you had 5 dollars he would have 10 dollars

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What do you call a man with no penis? WOahMan! O_o

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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