Why did Elliot Spitzer cross the road? To go have sex with a hooker.

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One's fun to hit with a sledgehammer and the other is a watermelon.

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What did the boy get for his birthday? Older.

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a giraffe walks into a bakery, "can I have 101 brown loafs please?" the baker answers: "hmm I've got only 100 loafs is that ok too?" the giraffe says: "why the hell would I need a 100 loafs?!"

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What did the Police Officer do after he made a positive identification of a Prostitute? He proceeded to pay her in cash for sexual favors because prostitution is legal in the state of Nevada

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What do u call a dumb Asian. An american

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I have suicidal thoughts

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What is 1+4x : No i will not take my pants off!

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Why was the black man drowning? His boat sank.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the car? Get in the car, Robin.

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how do you get a blonde to stop following you? file a restraining order.

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why was six afraid of seven? because seven threatened to kill him and his family.

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what do you find at the top of mountains? things

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I helped build the town school. But when people see me, no one says "Hey, there's the guy that built the town school." I helped put out the flames, when the city was on fire. But when people see me they don't say "Hey, there's the hero that saved the city." But I have sex with one goat.... And people judge me justifiably asd having sex with goats is really disgusting and sticks in peoples minds.

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What do you call an iphone in a puddle? Broken

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Whats worse than spilling ketchup on your shirt? Getting hit by a bus

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What do you call a black mailman? By his name.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, i have Alzheimers, Roses are red

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because I threw him

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why did the chicken cross the road? because there were no cars coming and it seemed like a safe time to cross

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A pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel on his crotch... The bartender calls the police as the man is arrested as piracy an act of robbery or criminal violence.

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Hello.

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What did the three blind mice say to the priest? I'm blind :(

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting thrown in to a car and raped violently.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops