If a tree falls on a deaf person, does anyone care?

A wife asks her husband to treat her like she's special. So he tells her, "Gooooooooooo... Maaaaaaaaaaaaake... Meeeeeeee.... Aaaaaa.... Saaaaaaaandwitch

How many surrealists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? -Fish

Roses are green,violets are blue,i'm high as ****,is that perfume or glue?

a 10 year old walks into a bar and orders a beer, he is then escorted out because you are not aloud to be under 21 years old to be in a bar

A man walked into this bar, and said ouch.

Roses are red Violets are blue Charcoal is black So is my neighbor

Well Nero, my actual name is Axel Knight, I might have used your "moralman" identity as my own social experiment of sorts, I mean no offense, and if you will leave some contact information, I am sure we can arrive to some kind of settlement... ...Keep your identity crisis thing, I have absolutely no reason to continue communicating here, besides, its six million followers, actually more like seven...

aa

What goes in dry and comes out wet and sticky? Bubble Gum

How much cocaine did Charlie Sheen take? Enough to give him a bad reputation, but not enough to kill him

How do you make pie without the oven? I dont kow, go google it.

What do you call a quadriplegic person in the water? One should refer to them by their name, but seeing as a quadriplegic person would be incapable of swimming if you do see a quadriplegic person in a body of water you should seek help or call emergency services.

what do you call a black man who beats his wife, doesnt have a job and has a ton of kids? whatever his name is.

What do you call a flying Jew? Smoke

What do you call the black stuff in between an elephant's toes? Depending on the location of the elephant it is either dirt or it may be tar in the case of an elephant in captivity.

Why can't Dave drive? Because Dave is an orange.

How do you tell if an alien had been in your house? All your lightbulbs are gone and your fridge is pregnant.

You're as useful as Baby P's dummy.

Is your refrigerator running? Yes. Good because it is important to keep food chilled to prevent it from spoiling and in turn wasting money

What are blacks scared of? The kkk

this is not a drill.

roses are red, violets are blue, im not going out with someone that belongs in a zoo.

Mitt Romney

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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