A rooster lays an egg on the tip of a roof. Which side does it fall to? Roosters don't lay eggs

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Who gets more action than my best friend Reese? My raped cousin....

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I used to be able to walk, but then I took an arrow to the knee. It tore my acl and shattered my kneecap.

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God Nero, Marry me now! I removed the nose thingie but it wont stop.

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why did the boy have to go to the dentist he was hit by a brick

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra. It was hanging on a clothes line he didn't see.

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It's Christmas in Iraq. Merry Christmas

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What did the limp dick say to the vagina? Is that rash contagious?

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Why did the boy throw the clock out the window? He was tired of working for the man.

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your mother is so fat that she got brain damaged from cardiac arrest and now needs medical care for the rest of her life.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's Roses are red...

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Yes 59 10 away from my faverite number....... 49

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i was quite upset when my girlfriend called me a peodifile, what does she know, shes only 6.

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what did one swedish guy say to another swedish guy? I dont speak russian

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What's worse than a baby dying of AIDS? It depends upon one's frame of reference. A family living in the US might consider the death of a baby by AIDS a horrible act by the gods. But to a similar family in sub-Saharan Africa, this might be a regular, albeit tragic occurrence.

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A mum and a dad were having guests round for dinner. The daughter overheard them arguing. Dad was calling mum a b*tch and mum was calling dad a b*stard. The daughter asked them what it meant and they just said, "oh, it just means ladies and gentlemen". Later, when mum was doing her makeup, she dropped it and said oh "sh*t". Daughter asked what it meant and mum replked "it's just another word for makeup". After that, dad dropped the turkey and said "oh, F*ck!" Daughter asked what it meant and he replied "its another word for cooking". When the guests arrived, the daughter answered the door, and said "hello b*tches and b*stards. Mums upstairs stuffing sh*t on her face and dads in the kitchen f*cking the turkey".

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*knock knock* Who's there? ...Who's there?... *opens door to find a dead baby on the front door step*

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A rabbi and a nun walk into a bar. They grab a drink and really hit it off despite their differences. After a couple years of happy dating, the rabbi, Mark, preposes. Gloria, the nun, gladly accepts. After four months, Gloria is pregnant. She dies in childbirth. The child has many illneses and dies within a week. Mark commits suicide.

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What do 9 out of 10 people enjoy? Gangrape.

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What's worse than a burglar breaking into your house in the middle of the night? A rapist breaking into your house in the middle of the night.

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Little Miss Muffett sat on her tuffet eating her curds and whey along came her food allergies and she died

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Q-"what did the carrot say to the plant" A-"nothing because neither one of these objects can talk"

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Who job is it to protect the forest? Obiously a male and/or female forest ranger of smokey the bear. It's that simple.

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Why didn't the man say, "Hello, Morgan Freeman!" when his friend walked by? Because his friend wasn't Morgan Freeman.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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