Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sarah.

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What did the Jewish man get for Christmas? Jews don't celebrate Christmas, therefore nothing

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What worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into an apple and finding 2 worms

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Why did the chicken cross the buffet table? To get to the other sides.

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Morgan Freeman walks into a bar. Everyone is pleasantly surprised that they are in the presence of a celebrity.

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Why is the boy home alone on Friday night? Because Hitler took he's parents away.

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What is black, can fly and sing? R. Kelly.. "I believe I can fly"

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Why was the teen boy shirtless? He was mauled by tigers.

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Me: What day is it? Rebecca Black: Tuesday

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Q: What did the police officer do when he saw another man getting assaulted. A: Went into a corner and started fapping to it.

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How do you get rich? Sell knives at warped tour.

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What do you get when John pulls your toe off the waterfall and takes three from an caramel? -6 to the power of golf.

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What did the old women do when she found her husband dead? She had a heart attack and died as well.

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what did the Alaskan homeless man get for Christmas? Death

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i am writing this because i felt like it.

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why did the hedge hog cross the road? To get to his 'flat' mate!!

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Knock Knock Who's there? Ada! Ada who? Ada burger for lunch!

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you put the chevy to the levy when your pants fell heave diarea

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why do you throw the baby up the tree??. to get me ball back.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because his monthly car bill is too freaking high and can't afford to take car to work, where all of his co- workers are waiting to tease him!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didnt, he got hit by a bus.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The Door! He then broke down into tears as the nightmares from his schizophrenia had lead to a severely crippled mental state.

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Why is a four year olds bedroom the hottest place in Texas? Its on fire, like the rest of the state because of a tragic wildfire thats ruining the lives of many people.

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Always do, always will, I have overcome far worse, doctor told my mother when I was born (without a heartbeat) that I was dead, and if they somehow managed to get me breathing again (heart beating etc) I would have suffered so much brain damage that I would not have a concious mind, in other words I would never have been able to learn anything, not to speak nor to type... ...Gotta say I pretty much fucking disagree with the "good" old doctor, and for the record, my heart is as healthy as... Healthy can be I am ambidextrous, but because of this eyedrum mutant thing of mine, I cant tell left from right, because well, to my radar senses both are left and right. Sorry if I am not making much sense here, just bleed a bit out of my nose, had it been from my ears, things could have gotten ugly, but no, its all good.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops