What is worse than waking up by your alarm clock on the weekend? 9/11

Let me tell you a story kids about Bill. Now bill seemed like any ordinary guy, he had a job a wife kids and he even coached the little league baseball team for boys. Well he had all the kids come to his house to celebrate the championships,they won, and he accidentally killed a kid while trying to hit a pinata. He had to kill the rest of the children to hide evidence so he killed them all quick and buried them in a 6ft. hole in his basement where they lay for 9 years today.

14 people jump in a hole about 25 ft deep. they can't climb out because it is a straight vertical drop.

sir ya look like ron weasly hhahahahaha LEL

Why did the black man cross the road? Black people don't exist.

I take the "the" out of Psychotherapist

How many police does it take to change a lightbulb? None, they all beat the room for being black.

Q: What is sad about 4 people in a Cadillac driving over a cliff? A: You could have fit more.

A horse didn't walk into a bar. The door wasn't big enough

Q. What do you call a woman who, after 72 hours of hard labor, finally gives birth? A. Mom.

What did one friend say on his friend's myspace page? You need a Facebook

What's black and really really smelly? Martin Luther King Jr.'s grave.

What did the little girl who lost her baby teeth want for Christmas? A pony.

What happens when you catch a cold? You sneeze whenever you stand up.

how do you punish helen keller? leave the plunger in the toilet.

Yo mamma's so fat, we are all seriously concerned for her health.

How do you confuse a blonde? Paint yourself pink and throw green banana at her.

If you are floating down main street in a canoe and your front right propeller falls off, how many pancakes can you fit in a doghouse? None, because ice cream doesn't have bones

Q. How do you make your dog stop barking? A. Take it to the grocery store. Replace it with any popsicle in the fridge.

How did the dyslexic, purple horse commit suicide? It jumped off the Grand Canyon.

What did Helen Keller name her dog? Max

Your mother is so fat that her BMI is larger than average.

When I get aroused I get a solid snake

Why was the boy seeing stars? It was night time.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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