roses are red violets are blue no seriously they are

what should you say when your mates nan is in hospital with a broken leg??? ha ha my nan can stand up shes just genetically better

What do you call a Mexican in a kitchen? A chef.

What's big and juicy and liked to be sucked by women? A penis.

Me and my friend wanted to burn some calories so we found a fat kid and lit him on fire!

Your mom is so stupid she has to get homeschooled for college!

A black man is in line for a club. The bouncer says: This is a white party only. The black man says: Damn, I wasnt aware I had to wear white clothing. He then left the line and told himself to check the promotional page on facebook more often.

Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and I thought to myself, where the heck is the ceiling.

What's the humor in an elevator? Me jumping up and down yelling we r all gonna die.

Billy was so silly that he named his pet zebra Spot.

"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Chuck Norris." "Chuck Norris who?" "NOBODY SAYS 'CHUCK NORRIS WHO'!!!"

Bigfoot, Santa, a dumb blonde, and a smart blonde all jump off of a cliff. They all reach terminal velocity and at impact at the same time. However, no one really cares.

How do you attach a nipple tassle to a purple honey badger? Refridgerator

Why did the chicken cross the road? Maybe because it had escaped from the farm and as it doesn't have full conciousness, it couldn't distinguish between grass and the asphalt, so it happened to cross the road.

My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well, I was amazed, I never knew they worked

A blonde went to a doctor for a checkup. The blonde couldn't hear the doctor 'cuz she had headphones on so the doctor took them off. A couple of minutes later she died. The doctor was curious so he put the headphones on. It was saying, "Breathe in, breathe out. Breathe in, breathe out..."

your mother is so fat that her doctor advised her to stick to a strict diet and exercise routine to help her lose weight

Q: Why Did The Family Eat Olive Garden For Dinner A: Because it was a simple way to please everyone but letting them choose their own meal

Yo momma's so fat she went to Antartica and all the penguins were like, "Woah. You're fat."

Knock, Knock. Who's there? Elephant. Elephant who? Seatbelt.

Which is the smallest? A. Jupiter B. Whale C. Cow D. Bracelet Answer: D

A man was found dead, in an ice cream van, the other day. He was covered from head to toe in hundreds and thousands, with two flakes sticking out of his ears. The police say it was a tragedy and will be informing his next of kin in the next few days.

Wanna hear a joke? Your life.

what did the apple say to the peer... I taste better !!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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