Q: why cant elvis draw a picture. A: cause hes dead.

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Why did the little boy throw his clock out of the window? After hours of searching for the snooze button to no avail, the little boy became so irritated at the incessant ringing of the alarm that he threw it out of his window in a fit of rage. The clock landed on an old woman who was walking twenty stories below. She was immediately killed on impact.

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Knock Knock. Who's There? Your Face.

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Where do cows go in their free time? burger king.

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Ever had Ethiopian food? Neither have they

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whats the difference between a fur rug and a pile of dead babies? i dont lie on a fur rug to pleasure myself

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Whats fat and gay joe diragi

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Roses are red Violets are blue What about green? That seems mean...

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knock knock! who's there? Jim Jim who? Jim Goldenbach

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An american, a french and a japanese walk into a bar. They are colleagues from the International University of Florida, used to go out together.

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Whats white and can kill you if it falls out of a tree? A refridgerator

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If I said you had a beautiful body would you stop asking me if those jeans make you look fat?

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Two penguins sitting in a bath tub. One says, "Pass the soap." The other says, "What do you think I am, a clock!?!?"

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What do you call a black man running really fast down a street? Active.

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why did the plane crash the pilot was a loaf of bread

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What happened when rudolf bucked Santa? Santa ripped his hooves off and started hitting his nose until it stopped glowing

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"Ask me if I'm a tree," "Are you a tree?" "No."

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What do you get when you cross a 747 with a passenger train? A large colission with hundreds dead and injured.

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What's long, hard and full of seamen? A submarine.

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I'm Donald Trump! Wump wump wump! Win a few Lose a few I'm Donald Trump!

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Friends are like lettuce; If you eat their head, they die

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What did the little girl say after her dad hit her? Nothing. She was a month old and died instantly.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know.

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What do you do if you run over a black man? Call an ambulance... he's probably about to die.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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