What did helen keller say when she saw a talking horse? nothing. because she didn't see the horse and they also cannot talk.

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What happened to the Asian who ran into the wall with a boner? He ejaculated his sperm, impregnating the wall. The wall went to the authorities, and the man was charged with rape. He is now serving a 10 year prison sentence, with no possibility of parole.

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Yo mamma's so fat she has her own zip code!!! :) Well... the actual reason is she is filthy rich and her house is so big that it takes up a bunch of room, and now that im talking about her i really wanna be her even though shes fat!

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Why did Nico Bellec not shoot that one guy? Just joking, this is Grand Theft Auto 4 dummy.

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There was a dog walking down the street with his GF. The dog can have a GF and can talk because this is an anti joke. Then the dog broke up with his GF because he was unhappy with her scent. Dogs are weird that way. Then, sobbing, he saw something through the blur of his tears. The county fair was open! Elated, the dog ran to the fair and waited n the ticket line for a long time. He waited so long, he almost exploded. Once he got to the end, he reached in his coat pocket (yeah, the dog is wearing a coat. It's cold), and found no wallet. FUUUUUUU! By the time he got back, the fair was closed for the day. The next time he came back, he had a hard time getting through the line. When he did, he raced to the ferris wheel. Halfway up, the ferris wheel stopped. CWAP! The neckst daey, thee dwawg whent two the ferries weele and went up. Yay. At the top, he saw his house! there was a chicken crossing the road. WTF? Why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side. Phuck yeah.

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Your moma's so fat, she has a considerable list of medical health problems, and she is very miserable.

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Q: how do you fit 100 jews in a car A: 3 in the back one in the passenger seat and 96 in the ash tray

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Why did the baby fall off the swing? It had no arms or legs. Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because I kicked her in the face.

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What's worst than a crying baby? A dead baby What's worse than a dead baby? A pile of dead babies What's worse than a pile of dead babies? If there's an alive one at the bottom What's worse that an alive baby in a pile of dead babies? If it has to eat its way out.

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Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man said "he has a pulse". The operator then calmly stated "we are sending a helicopter to air lift him out of there as we speak". The man got helicoptered to the nearest ER, and the doctors did their best to save him. He ended up having to go on life support for three years until his family members finally decided to pull the plug. The medical insurance didn't cover life support and the family went broke because of it.

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What happened to the cow that couldn't moo? It died because it could not make it's needs known to it's fellow herd and was bullied and isolated.

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An Asian, white, and a black man decide to play Russian Roulette. The Asian goes first and shoots himself in the head. The white man picks up the gun for his turn. The black man runs down the street screaming. Cops see him and the white man holding the gun, both are sent to jail for life for the murder of their friend.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has he.

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why do you park in the driveway and drive on the park way

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Did you hear about the black guy who went to college? He graduated at the top of his class with a master's degree in engineering.

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I have a meeting with a man about a horse. I have a chance to win the triple crown. Barboro is gonna do awesome. Oh wait he is dead.

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What can fly? Lots of things

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why was the apple on the ground? because it fell

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What's worse than stapling a baby to a tree? Stapling the same baby to ten trees.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I like your mom Give me some glue

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Today my friend was surprised at the black joke I told today, but I can tell that joke because most of my closest friends are white.

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Now Showing: EVIL SLOTHS II "The worst death is a slow death."

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Billy and Suzy sitting in a tree... Billy is gay.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Everything I did, Was just a mistake like you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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