Q: Why did the mom try to wake up a sleeping bag? A: Because it's morning and her kid is curled up inside fast asleep

awkies when u see danni white fingering jacob :0;0;0;0, and jamie fingering himself..............

A blind man and his dog walk into a store, the man lifts up the dog and begins to spin around. When questioned about his activity the man replies, "I'm just looking around"

your mama is so stupid stole a free sample

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

Why didn't children go to their grandma at summer? Cause, they were hit by a car earlier that year and they are dead.

Why did America nuke Japan? Because Japan bombed Pearl Harbor.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, And really aggravate my allergies.

How many gun shots does it take to kill you? 1..2... 3...4... Samantha reapeatedly kept shooting her enemy until she noticed that her enemy was Chuck Norris. So how many gunshots does it take to kill Chuck Norris? The world may never know.

A man and a woman are happily married. The die

The following is neither a joke or anti-joke. It's a brainteaser. It's called the Monty Hall Problem. Suppose you're on a game show, and you're given the choice of three doors: Behind 1 door is a car; behind the other 2 doors are goats. You then choose a door. The host then opens another door and reveals a goat. He then says to you, "Do you want to stick with your choice or switch?" Is it to your advantage to switch your choice? The correct answer yes, switching gives you a better odds of winning. Why? There is a simple way to understand it without the mathematical demonstration. Suppose we have the three doors 1, 2 3 and the number 2 is the winner. If you choose not to change , of course the chances to win is 1/3. Now. what happens if you decide to change? The answer is that if you initially chose an incorrect door, you will always win. In the example, if you initially chose the door 1, the presenter will open door 3(because the door 2 is the winner so he can't open that door) So if you change you will win. The same happens if you initially chose door 3(the presenter will open door 1 and if you change you will win). You will only loose if you initially chose door 2(the presenter will open door 1 or 3, and when changing you will loose) So the conclusion is that if you always decide to change, if initially you have chosen ANY(and any in capital letters!) of the TWO incorrect doors you will win. So the chances when changing is 2/3.

Why is 6 afraid of 7 because 7 is a escaped mental patient that thinks 6 betrayed him

im saul and i love cock

Two Jews walked into a bar. Then bought it.

What's the difference between a red ball and a blue ball? There both blue but the red one

Why did the chicken cross the road? - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - I lied, it was a goat.

how do you get a scouters power level to 9,000? power levels dont exist in real life therefore cannot reach 9,000

Why was Stephanie sad? She dropped a washing machine on her toe

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got run over by a semi and died.

Why did the child with one arm shave his head? He is a swimmer.

What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence? Given the unlikely circumstance in which an elephant actually does sit on your fence, it is equally unlikely said elephant would be able to do so unseen by witnesses, of whom you may ask what time the event occurred. Assuming your witness thought to look at the time befor calling animal control.

What do you call a man with no arms or legs? His name.

So, I'm sitting by this guy in Science class and we're learning about fungi. So this guy is being really nice and I tell him, "Bro, you're just a FUNgi to hang around", like fun guy.

whats wooden and hard a wooden floor

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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