What is an emulation? I am not as stupid as I seem by the way, I am just a bit shaky myself, but don't you worry i will answer whatever you need,

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Q:why did the boy not have to walk his dog? A: because the dog and the rest of his family died in a terrible house fire while he was away at summer camp.

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what did the pizza say to the bread? nothing pizza cant talk

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Q: Why can't a tomato fly a plane? A: Cuz it's a tomato

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Q Whats Yellow, Has a body, And has a Spiky head ? A a pineapple

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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What's better then 100 dead babies in a barrel 1 dead baby in 100 barrels

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How do you get a girl with two jobs to drop on her knees? Through a penny on the knees

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How do you know when it's hot outside? When you walk oside and it's hot.

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To tell the truth... Your really an abortion that grew

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when you smile the whole world stops and stares for a while because you have one tooth and its half chipped.. and your a black mexican red head.

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You know what's the least funniest part about cancer? I am about to die in about a month or so.

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Who invented apple? God

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What did the pony say when it lost its voice? Nothing. Ponies are incapable of speech.

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What crawls on the ground and shoots arrows? Legless Legolas.

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How to confuse a dumbass: see next post.

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a Dyslexic, Agnostic, Insomniac stayed up all night, wondering if there really was a dog.

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Pandas Everywhere!!!

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A duck walks into a 7-11 and says "Give me some Chap-stick, and put it on my bill!" But the cash register attendee doesn't speak English and cannot understand him. He does, however, question whether his God is punishing him because, as all people know, Ducks cannot speak. However, this hallucination must be punishment for a horrid misdeed. The employee breaks down into tears and begins reciting a prayer. The duck, slightly miffed, walks out, pondering why he'd need Chap-stick anyway, since he has no lips.

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A man and a woman are in a bar. The man says, "Excuse me miss, but you're very attractive, may I please buy you a drink?" to which the woman replies, "Thank you very much, but I'm afraid I've never been to Mexico."

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Knock knock Whos there An axe murderer oh sweet come on in.... dinners on the stove and i am here all alone

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Jimmy was skipping in the park one day when a young boy stopped him. "Hello there, would you like to be friends? We can go behind the old oak tree and play soccer!" asked the boy. "Ok!" replied Jimmy, and they went off together to play. The so-called 'young boy' was actually a wanted midget rapist. Jimmy was brutally raped and filmed. The film was later uploaded onto the internet where it blew up in a matter of weeks. Jimmy had to move schools 6 times and had to go to counselling every week. He finds it hard making friends and later went on to become a heavy cocaine addict.

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If Steve has 5 apples and gives Jenny 2, it is obvious they aren't eating oranges.

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What did Valerie get for her birthday? Nothing. Because no one loves her

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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