Q: what happened to the man who dropped the soap? A: nothing, he casually bent over and picked it up.

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Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven is a registered sex offender.

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A blonde girl walks into a hairdressers and asks for a slight trim. She leaves the hairdressers fairly happy with the result although she was unhappy with the price which she later concluded was most likely because of the rising inflation. However overall she felt it had been a successful outing.

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Lil Wayne

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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You just wasted time of your life reading this, and perhaps even more wasted time thumbing this down.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Violet, Not Blue, Kill yourself.

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what's 6 inches long and women love? my penis

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Nuneaton..

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what do you call a prostitute with white eyes? emma , with the cloudy iris,

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What is worse than being unemployed? Terminal Cancer

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one day a hippy and a nun wer on a bus, the hippy asks, Will you have sex with me? the none replies, heck no im a nun. the nun gets off the bus and the hippy follows. the bus driver stops him and says, i know how you can have sex with her, she goes to the cemitary at 9:00 every night, dress us as jesus and command her to have sex with you. okay thanks! the hippy says. that night the hippy dress's up as jesus finds the nun and says " i am jesus and i command you to have sex with me. The nun says okay but only A n a l because im a nun! and they get to it, when there done the hippy takes off his mask and says haha im the hippy, the nun takes off her mask and says haha im the bus driver!! like if you get it :)

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The Game.

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why was the man sad? his wife died

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*prepares this to get negative votes*

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What was the homeless guy doing on the side of the rode? Begging for money.

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How do you know if you are an alien? When you start maulesting sea creatures for their milk

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why couldn't the blind man hear? because he was also deaf.

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What do you call a man who has lost both his legs, one arm, and half his eye? Larry

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Why was the black man tired? It was 3 AM, and he just came back from his demanding job as a surgeon.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? She had no arms or legs. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie...

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Why did the loser end up in hospital? Because he was smoking glue.

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So 2 apples are having sex, and one apple sais to the other, I got worms.

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Boy: Why is the sky blue? Man: Because it is

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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