What did the monk give to the cancer patient? His love and reassurance.

How many babys does it take to paint a wall red? 7 and 24 paint brushes cause babys need do overs

ROSES ARE RED, VIOLETS ARE BLUE, I OFFERED YOU SOME CEREAL, MADE OUT OF MY DOGS POO BY VICKY AND RENATA WOHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was high.

What is shit? It's Deshitified already.

Why are anti jokes so funny? Because their not.

what did the apple say to the orange? -- NOTHING! APPLES DO NOT TALK!

A Russian man walks out of a bar looking very sober because he walked out of the bar sober.

Why can't Elvis Presley drive a car backwards? Because he's dead!

What do you call five black guys surrounding one white guy who bosses them around? Whatever his name is.

A car walks into a bar.

What happened when the man was about to hug the sexiest person he ever saw in his life? He hit the mirror.

Why did Little Timmy eat Smarties before school? Because he was hungry.

Knock knock Who's there? Hi I'm John from the jehovah witness society down the street and I'd love to talk to you about your beliefs! Would you like a pamphlet?

A man and his son cross the street, the man hears a screaming noise and ignores it, the man gets across and notice his wife missing...

what did the robot say to the centipede? "Stop being a centipede!" It's funny because the robot doesn't have any arms.

why didnt the black guy die on the bus fire? The fire was in the front of the bus!

Q: Who visits the dyslexic boy on christmas A: Satan

Knock knock whos there? Underware Underware who? I underware my friends are

Your girlfriend.

What happens when you play a country song backwards? Gibberish.

How do you confuse a bar tender? You ask him how tender he is.

WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey!!!" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

Why did the chicken cross the road? How the hell should i know, i do not speak chicken.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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