Want to hear a joke? Women's rights.

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Police Officer: Please step out of the car, sir Jimmy: Xbox...

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What do you get when you put a black guy in a blender. Why are you still reading....

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What happenes if you put an elephant in the fridge? Nothing, it wouldnt fit.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven's bigger.

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Q: what is long hard and full of seamen A: a submarine

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What did George Washington say before he crossed the Delaware? "Get in the boat."

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Your mom is so fat that she saw a school bus full of white children and , thought "I can hardly even remember a time when my body used to be slim." She now keeps track of her diet and exercises regularly,the result of this has been a weight loss of over 95 pounds.

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Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms... Why couldn't sally get up? She had no legs Why did no one help sally? Because she has no friends.

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Whats funnier than 2 dead babies? Seinfeld, and I hate Seinfeld.

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Have you ever tripped over a leaf? No. Neither have I.

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Why did the woman stop making a sandwich for her husband? Because he's dead.

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Why can't Benitio Mussolini win the war? Becuase he's dead.

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Why did Sara fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock.. Whose there? Not Sara

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What is you problem!? Im retarded, what is your problem?

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What did the black fire-fighter do when the house caught fire? The heroic man ran inside and got every animal and person inside to the out side and then proceeded to extinguish the flames with his fire-extinguisher out, thus saving most of the families valuables. He was then awarded a raise in his salary for his heroic valor. Although any fire-fighter could have done this because of the hard work and dedication that is put into training. So really describing the race that this heroic man is was totally pointless.

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Q: why does the cat go out of the house by the window A: It doesn't the window is closed

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So three hikers decide to face the deadly challenge of climbing Mount Everest. They were unaware of the risks, and were all brutally killed in an avalanche.

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Why did the black man cross the road? To get to the chicken!

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Q: What do you call a cow with no legs? A: Lunch.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swings? Because at the climax point in the swing, gravity is making a much larger affect on you because you are pulling farther away from the earth as well as positioning your body in a way where it is awkward and unstable to support your body, which greatly increases the chance of you falling off and landing on the ground.

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Why did Dean Jones talk to his car? Because it was Herbie the love bug , a car possessed by a demon that had voice recognition capabilities and thus could understand him

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What the difference between a black person and a piece of shit in a bucket? The bucket

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Your mamma used to be fat till Slim Fast came out with dick flavor!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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