How many babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends on the training and hence productivity of the babies.

a man walks into a bar several people leave as they can see the potential danger in the situation. - the man (also so known as a hippo) was Matt Ross

What do you call a chicken with no feathers, no guts, and no head? Fried chicken

What killed the dinosaurs? THE ROCKET POWERED FIST!!!

Are you from Tennessee? Because you look like a product of incest

What's funnier than the holocaust? Nothing.

Two people were playing Monopoly. One was a blonde and one was black. The blonde said, "your turn".

Why did the jewish plumber commit suicide? After years abuse from his alcoholic father and rich sibling, he finally snapped and killed himself on his birthday after nobody told him happy birthday.

What body part do you shave other than your balls? My fridge.

What do you call a man with no arms or legs in water? Drowning

How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

A family of five sit on a bench, the bench falls the family die.

A horse didn't walk into a bar. The door wasn't big enough

How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb? One. Though if the ladder is rickety and she needs someone to steady it for her, two.

Roses are red, Violets are blue Oh, that's good to know.

What did the Joker say to Batman? Why are we wearing these stupid costumes

What did Batman tell Robin before he entered the batmobile? Robin, I had sex with your mother this last Thursday.

who likes gay porn and has dirty littlesweeneys thathesticks up his hole? Jahn Willems

Why can't the blonde dial 911? Because she's been bound and gagged by kidnappers who are holding her for ransom.

You are walking down the street. You see 3 black people and you don't talk to them because they are complete strangers.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

Why didn't the boy get what he wanted for christmas? His parents had killed him.

Roses are black Violets are black Everything is black Im blind

An epileptic man attends a rave.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...