why was the woman out of the kitchen, because she had to have sex with her husband in a bed

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What fruit is used to make apple juice? Apples

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Why did the man jump off a cliff? Because he was committing suicide.

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A duck walks into a bar, guess what the bartender does............ GIVES HIM A SEAT AND 6 FREE SHOTS! But instead of that the bartender promptly escort the duck out considering the fact that in all bars there is a no animal and/or pet policy so the duck went... and commitid a series of loud noises before he got to a hotel and hung itself, that is what any depressed hungover duck would do.

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What did the Dark Knight say to the Policeman? I'm Batman

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ADAM SAS IS A GREAT GUY!

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Why didn't the Baby wake up? Because it was dead

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What do you call a man with an Eye patch and no arms? Names.

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What's worse then having gum stuck on the bottom of your shoe? Having a stick poked in your eye. What's worse then having a stick poked in your eye? Having a nail go through your foot. What's worse then having a nail go through your foot? Having a stick poked in your eye and a nail going through your foot.

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Why did Susie fall off the swingset? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

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Why did little Suzie spill her drink? Since birth, she has lacked a jaw.

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Q: what's better than ice cream A: not having aids

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What do you call a black guy in a Walmart? A customer. You prejudice dullard!

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i have a six pack.... of crayons......... just kidding i ate two of them

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Knock knock come in.

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what's the difference between a black man and a bench? the bench is an inanimate object

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what did jake say to the priest? hmmm, salty

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Whats smells like a banana and is purple? A banana, I lied about the purple thing.

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There was a little boy and a little girl in a bathtub having a bath. Suddenly the little girl looked down at the boy. "Can I touch it?" "No way -- you already broke yours off!"

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Generator? One powers your house...and then there's the generator.

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You make me believe in myself, after all, it takes one to know one, I just wonder what I am, what are you?

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What is worse then falling into a lava pit? Nothing you idiot.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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Roses are red, violets are blue a face like yours belongs in a zoo. Don't you worry I'll be there too, not in the cage but laughing at you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops