What's worse than finding an apple in your apple Finding a black guy in your school

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What do you say to a womam with two black eyes? Nothing, she's already been told twice.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Maybe because it had escaped from the farm and as it doesn't have full conciousness, it couldn't distinguish between grass and the asphalt, so it happened to cross the road.

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What do you say on a date with Uma Thurman? Hey Uma, pass the salt.

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João Duarte reads this.

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Were can you find a bag of meth? A drug dealer

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Your mom

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what in the world is smarter than the world's smartest man? Nothing he is the smartest man.

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(Guys I want to get the most likes so like my joke.) What did the person want. To get the most likes :)

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Whats a welfare? Its what keeps you alive.

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Jennifer Kim... having a boyfriend!

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Q. What do you call a white guy with a black dick? A. Gay

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A gorilla walks into a bar and order a banana martini. The bartender thinks this is a little peculiar and then becomes aware he is actually dreaming. He wakes up from his dream and begins to tell his wife about the ridiculous dream he had. His wife just ignores him, the man rolls over and begins to sob because he realizes his marriage is in shambles.

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So you keep your knowledge sharp do you? When it comes to hypnosis and such?

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Jesus can walk on water, but Chuck Norris can swim on land... it's called having a swimming pool

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You walk into a plane full of Arabs talking about how much they hate America. You arrive at your destination enlightened about the problems in American society.

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Yo mama so poor, she can't afford luxuries

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mark lawson likes boys

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A new family have moved in next to me. They have three little kids and they've challenged me to a water fight in the back yard, so I'm just writing this while I'm waiting for the kettle to boil

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What do you call Justin Bieber's assassin? A hero doing a noble favor to the community.

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What is the connection between a blonde and a halogen headlamp? There is none, one is a female human being with blonde hair and the other is a headlamp with a halogen lightbulb.

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What has four legs and can fall out of a tree and kill someone? A pool table.

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What do you call Bob if he gets a nose ring? Bob

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IT SOUNDS SO WROOONG! Actually I was thinking more about when I go short sentences, you go short, then I decide to put in like 500 lines in a single comment and then you do. Besides I call it caps! And no, I do not want you to be like me, there was already another me, it was a complete bitch killing him, I mean if I did not know a lot worse, I would say his chances at kicking my ass where equal. By the way, that "you you seducer" totally sounded like something Donald Duck would say, I dig Donald, so I guess I am into cartoons.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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