How do you know if you are an alien? When you start maulesting sea creatures for their milk

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Boy: Why is the sky blue? Man: Because it is

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what's 6 inches long and women love? my penis

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what do you call a prostitute with white eyes? emma , with the cloudy iris,

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? She had no arms or legs. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie...

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why did the chicken cross the road? there was chicken food on the other side

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You just wasted time of your life reading this, and perhaps even more wasted time thumbing this down.

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What is worse than being unemployed? Terminal Cancer

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Why did the loser end up in hospital? Because he was smoking glue.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Violet, Not Blue, Kill yourself.

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What was the homeless guy doing on the side of the rode? Begging for money.

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one day a hippy and a nun wer on a bus, the hippy asks, Will you have sex with me? the none replies, heck no im a nun. the nun gets off the bus and the hippy follows. the bus driver stops him and says, i know how you can have sex with her, she goes to the cemitary at 9:00 every night, dress us as jesus and command her to have sex with you. okay thanks! the hippy says. that night the hippy dress's up as jesus finds the nun and says " i am jesus and i command you to have sex with me. The nun says okay but only A n a l because im a nun! and they get to it, when there done the hippy takes off his mask and says haha im the hippy, the nun takes off her mask and says haha im the bus driver!! like if you get it :)

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What is funnier than one dead baby? Two dead Babies

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why couldn't the blind man hear? because he was also deaf.

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A man walks into a bar and gets drunk. He then goes home and proceeds beating his many wives in a drunken fit of rage.

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Why was the man foolish for buying a new lamp? Because he lived in a small shack with no electricity and was probably going to die soon.

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look this kid up on facebook and spam him!! its funny, Josh Noonan, also his cell number is 603 560 3399....

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Poems don't have to rhyme... Refrigerator

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"Why did the chicken cross the road? ... To get to your house. Knock knock." "Who's there?" "The chicken"

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What happened the homeless guy's home? A meteor fell on it.

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Jacob licked out his buthole again. It was becoming a usual thing for him to do, it suddenly became one of his hobbies and wanted to lick more, so he started licking MR. Macs

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Knock knock. Who's there? Cher. Cher who? Just Cher.

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what's a fish with no eyes and out of water? its just a fish

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Why was the boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops