Roses are red, Violets are blue. I'm wearing pants and I'm hungry

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Ring ring yes.This is doctor steve and we got our test results and it seems that you'r son has butinites and you'r kind sytoms are nothing because he is just an ass.

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This sentence is not humorous in any fashion whatsoever.

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Turnabout: American study of the Japanese Stereotype man: Murican: Excuse me Mr Japanese. Jap: The answer is within the heart of battle.. Murican: Yes but I just want to ask you some few questions. Jap: You are disturbing my feng shui I must power of the mystical fireball of surge fist energy get... *uppercuts waterfall BECAUSE REASONS!* Murican: What? But this is a serious study! Jap: Sowwy I do nothe speeky the shamefull language of the engrish! Murican: But you just said... Sigh... Conclusion: Carpet bombing of Japan funding increased. "slap a Jap" commercial project from world war two reinstated for the safety of the American people. Experiment two: The study of a American man raised in Japan. Murican: Hello I wonder if... American raised in japan: GADOUKEN GADOUKEN GADOUKEN! ORA ORA! Murican: Dead/KO. American/Japan: FRAWRESS VICTOLY! Result: World war 3 GET!

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whats the difference between slade , and wizard? wham

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The next sentence is true. The last sentence was a lie.

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What's cute and smokes? A cute person with a nicotine addiction.

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What did the Black women tell her Asian boyfriend in bed Nothing because they don't talk when they are sleeping

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Looks like this is a *puts on sunglasses* Pair of sunglasses

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Why didn't Jimmy go to school? Because Jimmy is a brick wall.

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What didn't the man piss on the dead baby? Because that is just morally wrong. Instead, he reported it to the police and aided the cause of justice.

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Obamacare

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie roll pop? After one hour, twelve minutes, and fifty-three seconds, Dave calculated that it approximately took 247 licks.

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why did joe drown ? he had no arms

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What's black and white and red all over? A penguin inside a blender.

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What's gayer than Justin Beiber? The guy getting a blowjob from him! Kelvin Yang.

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Person 1: Ask me if I'm a truck? Person 2: Are you a truck? Person 1: No.

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Why did the boy fail his midterm? he didnt study.

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404: Anti-joke not found.

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Have you seen Steve Wonder's house? No. It's okay, neither has he.

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Stop procrastinating.

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what's gray, red, and goes over a 100 mph? a toad in a blender

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"Knock knock" "The doors open" "Oh, okay"

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Why was the man sad? He was molested as a child.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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