Whenever someone asks you why you're sad, always remember this simple answer so that people won't keep asking you more questions: "Because Hitler died"

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What did the boy say when he got hit by a car? Nothing, he punctured his lungs.

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Something other than a Human Being walks into a bar. The bartender then makes a rational decision about how to handle the situation.

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~Roses Are Red~ ~Violets Are Blue~ ~I Am Straight~ ~Not Sure About You~ ~Tell us?~

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What do friends and potatoes have in common? If you eat them, they will die.

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Like to tell patrick porcupine to stop gaming

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Why was Six afraid of Seven? Seven was in a horrible car accident recently and became very disfigured. He didn't tell Six, so the initial shock of seeing him for the first time was quite jarring for Six. Seven has had multiple surgeries since and, once the swelling recedes, he should look much better. It will still hurt for him to chew though.

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Yock

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What does the fox say? Nothing a fox is incapable of speech.

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Once upon a time, The end.

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Knock Knock.. Who's there? The IRS, you owe $50,000 in back taxes and we're repossessing your home.

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Why did the blonde flunk out of school? Because she was a fucking idiot.

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What would you call it if Justin Bieber had sex with a woman? Sex, because thats what it is.

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Joe: CHOP CHOP KICK PUNCH HI-YAH! Mike:What are you doing? JOE: PRACTICING CHPO MENTAL KICK KARATE!!!!!!!

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How do you make a black plumber cry? - kill his whole family

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Beans, beans good for the heart, the more you eat the more likely you are to grow into a healthy young man/woman with low risk of heart disease.

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If life hands you lemons you're probably a hippy because you know someone named 'life'

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Aaaaakkkkkiiiiiinnnnfffffeeeeennnnnwwwwaaaa

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What starts with p and ends in orn? Popcorn

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Why did the kid take the trash out to the movies? Because his mum said take out the trash

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727-8088-954 Call Me. Say your name is Nick whether or not your a guy or a girl.

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look at the top of your screen. now look down. I MADE YOU DO THAT

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Whats gay, has a nice ass, and can such a mad dick? Everyone at LNS, including me, Glenn. Just kidding I like bitches.

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What's funny about black people? The fact that they are all in prison for not being visible at night time.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops