What is worse than a nuke exploding? Going to the hospital and finding out you have cancer and aids.

Does that doctor take insurance? No, the receptionist takes the insurance, the doctor takes your blood... Well actually, the nurse does that.

A poor boy receives his first wrapped present in his entire life. Why did he hate it so much? Because it was a copy of "Mien Kampf" Is he Jewish? No, he actually does know what "Mien Kampf" is because he is poor and cannot read.

I would have buttered my bread, but the pool was cold.

Haikus are easy But they don't always make sense. Refrigerator.

Why didn't the boy get what he wanted for christmas? His parents had killed him.

Why can't the blonde dial 911? Because she's been bound and gagged by kidnappers who are holding her for ransom.

What's worse than kissy face pictures on facebook? The porn pictures on facebook.

Your momma is so ugly... Yeah, yeah, yeah my momma's ugly, but guess what, at least I'm not an orphan asshole.

who likes gay porn and has dirty littlesweeneys thathesticks up his hole? Jahn Willems

You are walking down the street. You see 3 black people and you don't talk to them because they are complete strangers.

Roses are Red Violets are Blue Holy guacamole Pineapples

what did the dog say to the muppet? WOOF

What did Batman tell Robin before he entered the batmobile? Robin, I had sex with your mother this last Thursday.

a group of mormons walk into a bar... just kidding mormons aren't aloud to drink.

An epileptic man attends a rave.

What did the Joker say to Batman? Why are we wearing these stupid costumes

Roses are black Violets are black Everything is black Im blind

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

What killed the dinosaurs? THE ROCKET POWERED FIST!!!

A man walks into a bar, sits down and talks to the woman sitting next to him. The woman took out a cigarette, and offered one to the man. The man said yes, even though he never smoked before, because he was trying to get with the woman. They smoked a few more before the woman left, and the man left shortly after. The man became a chain smoker and died 1 year later from lung cancer caused by smoking multiple packs a day.

Q: What did the black man do at KFC? A: nothing, he ate dinner at home.

Whats more sad then four black men in a car driving off a cliff? The man they stolen the car from doesn't have car insurance.

Blonde: what does IDK stand for? Brunette: it stands for I Don't Know Blonde: okay, I get it now

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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