Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Not having an apple

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Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no hands. Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not sally.

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An elephant walked into a bar. By bar I mean jungle. Elephants aren't capable of walking into a bar.

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What do you call three Asian people eating a cat? A tragic last resort for a starving family.

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why did the donkey kick the men bc he tryed to pen the tail on hes ass

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Three men stumble upon an ancient lamp in the desert. They sell it to a museum and split the profits evenly.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the idiot's house... Knock knock Who's there? The Chincken

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Is this the krusty Crab? No you idiot this is a phone!!!!!

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What does a homeless guy do when he's hungry ? Nothing, he has no food.

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A: Whats black and hangs from my tree in my backyard? B: What? A: Blackberries B: Blackberries grow on bushes

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Why did Sally fall off the swing. She had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there Not Sally

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Why did the fat kid fall of his bike? The skinny kid pushed him off!

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A Brunette, a Redhead and a Blond all jump off a cliff, which one will hit the ground last? Since the acceleration of gravity is 9.8 m/s they will all hit the ground simultaneously and with enough force to completly shatter their bodys making body recovery extreemly difficult. They must have had a hard life.

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why did the asian kid do well on his math test because he studied

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David Cameron

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What do you get when you cross a rock and a paper bag? A rock inside of a paper bag.

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Why are black people afraid of chainsaws. Because they have razor sharp edges and can slice through flesh very easily, posing a potential threat if possessed by a violent person.

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What do you call a clock that neither ticks nor tocks? A broken clock

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A group of blondes rent a car and decide to drive to Disney World. Along the highway, they see a sign reading "Disney World left." They exit the highway, turn left, and enjoy their well-deserved vacation from practicing law.

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What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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Whats funnier than a dead baby tied to a tree? Everything, infant mortality is a very sad thing.

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why did the girl fall of the swing someone threw a refrigerator at her

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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Because he has no sense of living and no muscles to move.

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What's red and bad for youur teeth? A brick.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops