What do a carrot and a kangaroo have in common? Nothing...

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Hello

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How do you get a black man out of a tree? You provide him with a ladder of varying length depending on his height in the tree and hold the ladder to ensure that it is stable and safe while he is climbing down. If he his very high in the tree then it may be helpful to call the fire department for assistance in getting him down.

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What did the Mexican say to the Pirate? Hi, Steve!

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Why did the bird fall down? It got shot.

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One day a man was out fishing in the lake. Suddenly, there was a huge fish pulling his fishing pole so hard it almost broke. Luckily, he managed to pull the fish into his boat. It was the biggest fish he had ever caught and he brought it home for his family to see. They were all very proud.

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I found out I had asthma earlier today. I was breathless.

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Roses are Red, Blues are Violets, Have I Dyslexia, F**k.

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The WNBA is on the cooking channel

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What did the astronaunt say to the doctor? Hola!

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What's funnier than the holocaust? Just about everything seeing how the holocaust is not a funny event, but rather enormous tragedy.... Assholes.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: No one knows, he was a chicken, and was not capable of human speech, so he never told anyone.

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3 Blondes walk into a bar. One ducks, the other two are hospitalized with mild concussions

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What does a man that has to go to the bathroom do when there is no restroom within a reasonable walking radius? He gets in his car and drives to the nearest rest stop.

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c======3

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He actaully never did. He only made it half way before a cop issued him with an infringement notice for jaywalking.

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Santa Clause, a smart blonde, and the Queen of England all jump out of a plane, which hits the ground first? Galileo's theory tells us that all objects fall at the same speed regardless of weight, so they all hit simultaneously.

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Q: Why did the boy fall of the swing? A: He had no arms.

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You know you are really drunk if your blood alcohol Is higher than .08

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Why didnt the homeless man eat the cheese? Because he died right before he ate it. :-(

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What is so bad about a black jew. They have to sit in the back of the gas chamber

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Did you hear about the kid from Texas? He shot his campus up.

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Elephants can jump higher than the tallest building. You know why? It's because buildings can't jump.

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Want to get shot? Go to Virginia Tech. Too Soon?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops