why do you throw the baby up the tree??. to get me ball back.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Ada! Ada who? Ada burger for lunch!

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Knock knock. Who's there? The Door! He then broke down into tears as the nightmares from his schizophrenia had lead to a severely crippled mental state.

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Knock Knock Who's there? It's the Mortgage company. You haven't payed your loans. The man loses his house and becomes homeless.

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Q: how do you stop a baby's crying keeping you up at night A: pull out it's wind pipe

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Why did the Muslim suicide bomber commit suicide? He was nervous and didn't think he could hijack a plane.

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What makes boys so stupid? They like to play with girls' hearts and break them until they spew out blood all over the place.

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Whats black and is on sale in shops? Blackberries.

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Life

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why did the asian wearing a sombrero buy orange juice at 2am? because hes trying to stay sober and do away with alcohol for good because its ruining his family and he wants to be a good father and husband.

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I baked tonight. What did you bake? Brownies. What kind of brownies? Chocolate.

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Did you hear about the 2 pretzels walking down the street? It's not true, pretzels are not capable of autonomous movement.

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A dyslexic man gets asked what 1+1 is, he replies with a wopping 11. Grats <3

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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. The bartender looks up and says "what is this, some kind of joke?!"

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How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

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Why dont jews eat pork? Because the torah doesnt allow cannibalism

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*Walk Into The Bakery* "Excuse me, sir. How much does the challah cost (holocaust)?

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roses are red violets are blue heres the oven now where the **** is the jew

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What's worst than missing a doctors appointment? Having AIDS and missng out on getting a cure that could have gotten rid of your disease.

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A Priest, a Rabbi and an Imam were having dinner together at a local restaurant. Which caused a group of Republicans sitting nearby to ask for another table.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Its 2 in the morning Go the f+%& to sleep.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Plants are green because of the high levels of mitochondria in their cells.

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A priest, a rabbi, and a monk are standing near a cliff. They say that they are of the best religion. The priest jumps off the cliff and says "God save me", he dies. The rabbi says "Allah save me", he dies. The monk says "Buddha save me" he is saved, in relief he says "Oh thank God" he dies

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Q. What's a pirate's favorite type of movie? A. It depends on the individual pirate, although most modern-day pirates are from third world countries like Somalia and so are too poor to be able to watch many movies. Classical pirates like those depicted in Treasure Island or Pirates of the Carribean are, of course, from a period of history before movies had been invented, so couldn't possibly have had a favorite.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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