A black man and a Mexican are in the back of a car, who's driving? Their father Micheal, he adopted both of them from a mentally handicapped orphanage when they were five.

The girl was really drunk and passed out. She woke up the next day with a hangover.

How big does your mouth have to be to eat a baby? How would i know, i'm not a canible.

What succeeds most of the time? The population of a field with grass.

Q. What happened first The Tree or The Apple. A. Johny Appleseed.

What did the Jewish man say when he answered the phone? Hello?

What's worse than requesting a three-some to your in-laws? Forgetting to suggest that they me too fragile and disabled, resulting in one of their limbs breaking.

What did the piano say to the ice cube? Dude, get back in the freezer or you are going to melt!

What kind of martial arts does the Jewish man practice? Kung-Fu

What's worse than finding a worm inside your apple? Finding an apple inside your worm.

What did Little Tommy get for chirstmas? An explanation that Santa is a lie.

Adam and Eve ate the apple and felt a bit ashamed and stuff. God looked upon them and said, well its just a fucking apple get outta here you kids! Adam and Eve also took things a bit too literal

How many alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side

Two muffins are sitting on a counter. One muffin says to the other "hello." The other muffin says "Oh my god a talking muffin!"

Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from the slaughter house.

Roses are Red Violets are Blue I'm really drunk so show me your tits.

Killing people is not illegal just ask a soldier

whats a great gift to share with small children? Ebola

what do you get when you cross a dinosaur and a spaceship? a dinosaur spaceship

Two girls were taken away mysteriously in the night. The next day, no one cared because they were orphans.

A girl that had Malaria couldn't play with her friends, whys this? She died.

Hi

Yo mama so fat she left the house in high heels and when she came back she had on flip flops. tom halls mum

Whats Bin Laden's favorite store 9/11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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