What did the Dementia sufferer get for Christmas?

thumb_up thumb_down +35

My neighbours found out this morning that I'm a serial killer. Knock knock [L]

thumb_up thumb_down +35

A young farmers cow died in an oil burning, The farmer then said to his son; you get the milk ill get the shovel

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What do you do if you have a worm in your apple you throw it away

thumb_up thumb_down +33

minorities

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Have you ever seen the episode of the powerpuff girls where they save the day?

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Q: what is blue and floats in a pool? A: a baby Q: what is purple and at the bottom of the pool? A: the baby 5 minutes later

thumb_up thumb_down +33

I used to tell people: step on my foot on purpose and ill FUCKlNG BREAK YOURS! Then I Evolved.. friendly r*pist neighbourhood Moral Man: Thumb me down or step on my foot if only on mistake, and I will break off both your legs and ram them up your ASS!

thumb_up thumb_down +33

your mama so fat she has a low self esteem

thumb_up thumb_down +33

how do people without arms and legs have sex? no one has sex with people without arms and legs.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Yo mamma is so fat She has to wear big pants and is easily fatigued.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

How many frogs does it take to change a light bulb None. Frogs lack the cranial capacity to change said lightbulb. If eventually by evolution they become smart enough to change lightbulbs, they may learn to handle machinery and pose a real threat to humans.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

why did the squirrel cross the road? -because it was stapled to the chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Your mother is so fat that when she looks in the mirror she is deeply upset by her appearance.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

What's the difference between a smart blonde and bigfoot? There's been sittings of bigfoot

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Peg leg Pete, yay, I know stuff too, I watched that one all the time when I was a girl.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Your mama is so stupid she has an IQ lower than an average person.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Knock Knock! Who's there? No one. No one is ever going to be there for you. Also, you're adopted.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What do you tell someone who says they are contemplating suicide? where to find some cheap cyanide

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Why did the white guy sit on the bench while the black guys were playing basketball? His mother was calling, and his AP scores were coming in that day. Those scores were important to him.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Q. have you seen Helen Keller house A. niether has she

thumb_up thumb_down +29

why did the duck fall in the water? It got shot

thumb_up thumb_down +29

A blonde was drinking water from the water fountain. She was very thirsty.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Why do jews get their foreskin cut off? Because they're jewish.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops