A teenage girl walks into a bar. She sits down and watches the TV up against the wall. The bartender walks by and says "Hello, do you have I.D." The girl says "No, I'm just here waiting for my ride." The bartender then says "Well I'm sorry to have to tell you this but you gotta be 21 or over to sit in the bar." The girl says "Okay, but is there anywhere I can wait that is safe?" The bartender asks "Why?" and the girl replies "Well, I've been hiding from my ex boyfriend. I just broke up with him an hour ago. He was very controlling and he is still not over me. So now I'm here waiting for my new boyfriend." The bartender says "What you have a new boyfriend already? Maybe that's why your ex was angry." The girl says "yeah, I know, oh look there's my ride. It was nice talking with you, have a good night."

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penis

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What's 6 inches long, 2 inches wide, and drives women crazy. A 6 inch long 2 inch diameter syringe filled with heroin being injected into a woman.

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What do Kim Kardashian and a broken-down horse have in common? They will both eat oats out of your hand.

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what did one soldier say to the other... dude take your finger out my a** it has been that long

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What's black and white and red all over? My dog after she was hit by a car (true story)

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance? He had nobody to go with :)

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Why wasn't the door a door? It was a jar.

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Whats white and can kill you if it falls out of a tree? A refridgerator

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Wanna know how to confuse a black guy? Give him a friend chicken sandwich with mayo on it.

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There was a white kid named Tyrone.

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have you ever had african food? neither have they

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Why are the new york knicks called the new york knicks.? no one gives a crap

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A Matthew walks into a room. Everyone left. This is not a joke

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God saw himself. Finally, proof.

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what does a granny look best in? 1950

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What did the towel say to the other towel? Nothing, there was no topic of conversation.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, there is no reason for a chicken to need to cross a road.

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What do you call a black man driving a fire truck? A firefighter you racist.

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What do you get when you cross a Mexican and an African? A baby.

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Why? Why not?

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why did victor have a tube on his neck he was helping james with security

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What is the difference between a trampoline and a pile of dead babies? I take my cleats off when I jump on trampolines

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whats then difference between a jew and a pizza ? A pizza doesnt scream when its put in the oven .

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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