What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Nothing, because they weren't made. Cupcakes were made instead. Sorry, Muffins.

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What did the DVD player say when a video tape was put in? You incompatible.

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Patient: "Doctor, my arm hurts when I poke it with my index finger." Doctor: "That's because your finger is broken."

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why was the clown sad? died of cancer and left his loving family to fend for themselves in this cruel, cruel world.

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What did the gym coach tell his student? Come on! You can do it! Push harder!

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What's worse than crying over spilt milk? The Holocaust.

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On a scale of 1 to Lord Voldemort, how awkward would you say your hugs are?

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What is black, white, and red all over? A penguin in a blender!

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Why did the little boy stick a fork in the electrical socket? Because he wanted to escape his abusive stepfather

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Why did the mentally disabled child begin to cry? Because he shit himself

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Why did the black man cross the road? To get to the barber shop, which was located on the other side of the road. He then walked to the crosswalk, patiently waited, then crossed when the little person lit up.

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What did the dog say to his own poop? You gonna eat that?

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"Whooaaa Momma." - Says Johnny Bravo

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Why was the lady afraid of cooking? Because her husband always beat her with a frying pan

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Why did the

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Roses are red, Viiolets are blue, Get in the gas chamber, You dirty Jew.

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Roses are red violets are blue I can't rhyme fridge

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Knock knock Who's there? The events which followed are described by police as the August 4th massacre in which a family of five were brutally murdered by two prison escapees who broke into the house in search of a place to hideout.

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An American and Russian are arguing about their country. The American says "I can do things you can't. I can walk into the White House and into the Oval Office. I can bang my hands on my President's desk and say "Mr. Obama, I don't like the way you're running your country." The Russian says, "I can do that." The American says, "No, you can't." The Russian says, "Sure I can. I can go to Vladimir Putin's office and say "Mr. President, I don't like the way Mr. Obama's running his country."

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Q. Why did Sarah fall off of the swing? A. She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sarah!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why didn't the chicken cross the road?!

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The queen having a shit

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was in the designated crosswalk area and there was no oncoming traffic.

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Shark week? More like owl week. Hoo!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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