why are marcos hands all swetty. he just got done giving a hand job to joe.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To avoid being killed in the slaughter house.

When life throws you lemons, duck.

So a moose walks into a grocery store and asks the clerk, who is a penguin, "Where's the bread?" And the penguin says "On isle three!" But, when the moose gets to isle three... The bread isn't there!

What did the 14 year old girl get on her birthday? A cake that read, "You're adopted"!

What did the PC say to the Mac? Nothing you idiot! Computers can't talk.

What is the difference between a bright red Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

Some parents named their sons: Who, What and Where. Many people were left confused as to the couple's decision, and some remarked that the sons would likely get picked on in their early school years.

What do shoes and boxes have in common Both will get squashed if a washing machine lands on one of them

How did the black guy swim across the Atlantic? He didn't. He was prepared to, but then went on Expedia and found a ticket with Continental Airlines that was in his budget. He did not like the amount of service he recieved, and decided in the future he will save up and fly with a different company, or in fact swim across.

What do you get when you cross Jesus with James Woods? Crucifixion

whats black and white with red all over. something that's black and white with red all over.

Poop!!

A black man, a jewish man and an asian man walk into a bar. They are attending the wake of a friend who died of cancer.

9/11

I pulled a disabled girl in the pub last night. The handle on her wheelchair was caught in my jacket.

Why is Diarreah genetic? It runs in your genes.

How do you get a black guy out of a tree? Get a ladder from your house and kindly help him down.

What would Micheal Jackson do if he were alive today? THRILLER! THRILLER! THRILLERS NIGHT!

What do you call a sheep with big teeth? Mitch

Where's my tractor?

A blind man walks into a bar and a table and a lady....

Why did the dinosaurs go extinct? Well many scientists have theorized that a giant meteor hit the earth causing the extinction of most living things. Also if your christian : Dinosaurs never existed, evolution is the devils work, science is not the answer to the world's problems. Darwin was a foolish man, and thats that.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't, he was hit by a car. I lied about him crossing the road.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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