Husband: Take the f out of way. Wife: There's no f in way! Husband: You just swore

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A man walked into a bar. He said ow.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

This guy says: "Doctor doctor, it hurts when I do this!" He jiggles his arm and screames in pain. The doctor replies: "Well, don't do it then!"

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What was in the magical purple teapot? Two dying pelicans.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Did you hear about the peanut that was assaulted? He filed a police report weeks ago and is upset by the sluggish nature of the justice system.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

yo mamas so fat she weighs a lot.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why'd Carly fall off the swing? She got hit by a bus

thumb_up thumb_down +16

An Irish man walks into a bar, and then realizes that he's walked into the wrong establishment (He was looking for an upscale restaurant.)

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Q:what happen to amy's baby A:it was eaten by a dingo.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

I don't like Holocaust jokes. Anne Frankly they offend me,

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Your momma's so fat: She regrets not making the most of her youth whilst she was still attractive.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

pull my finger (farts)

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Roses are blue Violets are red What happened to the gay man? He listened to Justin Beiber And then was straight

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Thats what she said

thumb_up thumb_down +16

A man walk to the store and buys some clothes.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

they told me not to write here but i did

thumb_up thumb_down +16

If a bunch of midgets do the wave, is it a ripple ?

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Once upon a time, there was an ugly duckling. All the other ducklings made fun of the ugly duckling for being so ugly, and the little duckling felt bad. "Why do I have to be such an ugly duckling?," he asked. However one day, the duckling grew up and became........well, an ugly duck. Turns out he was just an ugly duck. The end.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Pull my finger. Not right now. I'm watching The Price is Right.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why did the little girl die Because she was kidnapped by a rapist, and defiled repeatedly, and then to get a ransom from her family the kidnapper slowly pulled out her fingernails and toenails, and sent them to the family the same thing happened with her fingers, toes, hands, feet, arms, legs, teeth, tounge, hair, and eyes, then she died of blood loss after nearly 2 months of torture.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

how do you wake up lady gaga you poke her face

thumb_up thumb_down +16

yo mamas so old she probably ralises the greater risk of breast cancer in middle age women.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What's green and invisible? Nothing; green and all other colours of the rainbow have wavelengths that occur specifically in the visible range of the electromagnetic spectrum. Therefore any invisible object cannot be green.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

what is black and green and red all over q: Nothing, you cant have 3 colors on the same surface

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops