Q: how do you get a live elephant into a refrigerator? A: you buy an industrial sized refrigerator from cost-co and then walk the elephant slowly but surely through the door. Q: how do you get a giraffe in a refrigerator? A: after removing the elephant by means of walking out the door, slice the giraffe into small pieces approx. 1m by 1m by 1m and put those into the refrigerator

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The hooker walks into a bar wearing a vest and tight denim shorts. A drunken man proceeds in trying to have his way with her. He is thrown out for sexual mis-conduct and is currently waiting for his court date.

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what did the fart say to the butt........bye

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Forgiveness is what weaklings beg for, while redemption is what the strong succeed at.

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Roses are black Violets are black Everything is black —Stevie Wonder

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Roses are Blue Violets are Red Watermelons are green Refridgerator

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What's the difference between a blonde and a carrot? One's a human, the other's a vegetable.

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i walk into a bar,and then proceed to be taken out because i am a minor -chuckles

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Why was 6 afraid of 7 7 was osama bin laden

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Guys, I think I'm gonna apply to join the Crips. My SAT score is a 2050, and their average score is a 2200. My GPA, however, is a 4.6, and their average is only a 4.2. Do you guys think that they will take me? Or should I try and apply for the Bloods?

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why did the girl fall off the swing ? because she had no arms.

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Q. Wheres your nan???? A. In my closet

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Knock Knock whose there YOUR MOM

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What do you call the people that ride on the upper level of a double decker bus? Passengers.

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Chuck Norris once starred in a movie with Bruce Lee.

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because She's Dead.

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Whats the difference between a lamp and Morgan Freeman? Alot

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A man walks into a bar gets hurt and falls over

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Two black guys and two asians get pulled over. The cop says i cant let you go unless all of your dicks add up to 15 inches. They added up to exactly 15 inches - The black guys both added up to 7 inches each and the asians added up to 1/2 inch each. When they were driving away both of the asians said thank god we had boners.

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Person 1- Ask me if I am a tree Person 2- Ok, are you a tree? Person 1- Nope

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Did you hear the one about the HIV positive man that got rear-ended on the highway? The motorist behind him was distracted on his cell phone, and did not hit the breaks in time to stop.

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Q: What's the difference between a child dressing as a ghost for Halloween and a real ghost? A: About a tablespoon of arsenic.

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A black man, a Muslim man, and a Jewish man walk into a bar so the bartender says, "Get the f*** out."

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Did you hear about the guy who got his left leg and left arm cut off, how is he? Well you see, the guy who got his left leg and left arm cut off...He's dead. I..um..he's straight up dead. I'm sorry, I don't know what to tell ya.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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