Why did the black man have a Lamborghini in his garage? Because he got good grades in school, was accepted into a nice college, and earned a medical degree, which he used to get himself a well-paying job in the medical field.

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What did the woman find when she got home from the post office? Her son's corpse hanging from a clothes hanger. She was an abusive mom, and he killed himself.

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What is white and will kill you if it fell out of a tree? Charles Manson

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What do you call a person from China? Chinese, duh.

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What did the man say to the ugly woman? Your face makes my penis soft.

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Are yu mad Twinkle twinkle little star if yu don't shut up I'm gonna hit you with my freaking car

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How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends how you throw 'em.

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Why did Sarah limp to school? Because she got hit by a tree

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What's the difference between a bicycle? An orange because it has no sleeves.

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What's the difference between a woman and the Universe ? One is full of mysteries mankind may never understand, the other is, well, the Universe.

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Chuck Norris counted to infinity; by calculating the sum of a divergent series.

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Q: What's worse than finding out yor girlfriend is a guy? A: He had sex with your dad.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse then precedes to beat the bartender voraciously for making fun of his religion.

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This is no joke. Well, I did warn you.

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Whats the difference between a sack of babies and a sandwich? A Sand which floats when you put it into a large body of water.

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-Knock knock -Use the doorbell -Oh... ding dong -Who is it? -Me -Oh -Yeah -Cool -Come in -Okay -Take off your shoes -Alright -How are you? -Good -That's good -Yeah -Okay -K -Oh -Bye -See ya

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Q: What's blue and smells like baby. A: A choking baby.

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What did the dead man say to God? I'm dead.

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he took my chicken i shoot him in the foot and raped his dog

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your friend is gay, but you are not. nothing happens

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hey! Wanna hear a bird joke? No. Well this is Hawkward....

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Today, my house burned to the ground. FML.

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There are 3 guys named:Poop, Shut up and Manners. They all were speeding down the street, they took a sharp turn and Poop fell out of the back. A cop pulled them over while Manners got out to go get Poop. The cop says, "whats your name." "Shut up." "No seriously whats your name." "Shut up" he says a little bit harsher. "Wheres your manners?" the cop says. "Back there picking up Poop."

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What is life? It is a sexually transmitted disease which always ends in death. There is currently no known cure.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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