Why did the chicken cross the road? His whole family attempted to cross the road approximately 30 seconds earlier and were immediately struck by a moving vehicle traveling at 45 miles per hour. He crossed the road to try to comfort his family while they took their final breathes of life. The chicken was also not really a chicken but a man that had recently been laid off from his union job and came down with a disease that is considered uncurable by modern science.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Cats meow Dogs have four legs

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How do you make a tissue dance? You really can't, but you could grab it and shake it around so it looks like its dancing.

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whats the best part of having sex with twenty-three year olds? there's twenty of them.

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Its easy they said, just type your text below they said, so I did

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Your momma is so fat she has an increased risk or cardiac arrest due to obesity. I ridicule her based on the theory that her morbid obesity is due to the fact that she has a diet consisting of large amounts of calories and high fat content and/or she is known to be very sedentary and does not partake in physical exercise. However, if this increase in body fat content is due to genetics I retract my previous statement and wish only the best for her, also, you might want to lower your calorie intake and visit your local gym, lest you succumb to morbid obesity, much like your mother.

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Why did the chicken cross the road. Because most living organisms eventually cross some form path that is commonly known as a road. Roads are hard asphalt that is very good for cars and other wheeled road licensed vehicles.

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Q: Why didn't the man give money to the homeless person on the sidewalk? A: Because he thought that he was faking it. Two days later the homeless person died in an alleyway from starvation. Nobody was there to witness it, and the body was never found.

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An Italian leaves the mofia

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What's worse than rain on your wedding day? You scheduling your wedding to be held on an aircraft carrier on december 7th 1941.

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Obama being reelected.

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Chris:"knock, knock" Rhianna:"owwww..." Chris:"open da door" Rhianna:"so u can punch me in the face" Chris:"duhhh, I jus got brass knuckles"

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If a blonde and a feather were dropped off of a building at the same time, which would hit the ground first? A feather is a light object and would most likely float all the way down at a slow velocity, the blonde is most likely 100+ pounds and would die because she is stupid.

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Why cant Michael J Fox draw a perfect circle? because he is dying of parkinson's disease.

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why did the computer monitor stop working? Becasue it has a date with a slice of cheese.

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Why are Americans so fat? Poor diet and lack of exercise.

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Lindsay Lohan

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what did the blind orphan with no legs get for christmas? cancer.

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Why did the man say ow? He got his dick caught in his zipper.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I look down My pants are brown.

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What peels, is a fruit, yellow and tastes like a bannana? A bannana.

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how many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop 1027

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When life hands you melons it means you're dyslexic.

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What did the chilean miner say to the other Chilean miner? I wish we could get out of here.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops