Why did Bob stop at the light? Because it was red and not doing so would be illegal.

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Today I wanted to make world peace.... So I killed everyone.

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Your momma is so fat, shes skinny.

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Knock knock Who's there? The Gestapo, time to go to Auschwitz.

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Why did the man have a bad day? Well first of all, his wife left him, then his two kids both committed suicide, then a large falcon pecked at him genital area. After that he proceeded to be hit by a car, and soon after he was hit by a bus. Following this, his corpse was raped by a transvestite pig, and then finally his spirit got hit by a plane on its way up to heaven.

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Why did Ant Man die? He was shot by a gangster, duh.

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1912, the titanic sinks, 1913 ww1 starts, 1939, ww2 starts, 1954, the vietnam war starts, 90's, cold war. wow! the 20th century sucked.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, nor does the chicken because it's a chicken.

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I asked a Jewish girl for her number, so she rolled up her sleve

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This one time at band camp music was played.

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How to you get a clown off a swing? You shoot it in the face.

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How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Stab her.

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How many Muslims does it take to screw in a light bulb? One.

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What do you call a lazy good-for-nothing who can't succed at anything, steals your money, and who is unskilled in every way? A women

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89 bottles of beer on the wall, 89 bottles of beer, if one alcoholic passes the wall, 0 bottles of beer on the wall!

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What do you call a blonde prostitute your bitch

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roses are red violets are blue a pyschorapist just ate me refrigerator

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Why did the President fall down? He was assassinated. -mattobrado

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Why did the plane crash? Because something was wrong with the engine

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What happened to the man who grew into the couch? He was surgically removed and forced to exercise daily. He is feeling much better now.

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Once upon a time, a duck named Jim went to work, he went up to the steps to his new job and and he was paid all day to sit in a hot tub. Little did he know it was a boiling pot and he was served at Christmas dinner

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Q. whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? A. A jew is a human of the jewish religion, and a pizza is food.

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We are few Nero, too few, if I want to split my money with you, would it help you find true happiness?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There I no road.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops