Why did the chicken cross the road? Who gives a crap?

I went to the opticians to get my eyes checked. The optician said "you need glasses".

How do you stop a black man from bleeding? You give him a bandaid. What if he keeps crying? Tell him to stop. What if he cries more? Buy him an ostrich.

What does Santa and a grape have in common? They're both purple, except Santa.

A blonde rubs a lamp hoping to find a genie that will grant her 3 wishes. It didn't happen.

What's the difference between a pizza and a black man? It would be cannibalism to eat a black man.

What's the difference between a cow and a Spanish person? To get to the other side

You're always working, why don't you spend some time with your daughter? be a good father. But i already am. We're sleeping together while you work every night.

Roses are red,Violets are blue, I like Tities and so do you

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? George Bush

Roses are red Violets are blue This poem sucks GET OVER IT

What did the black kid get for christmas?? Your tv

In this country, you gotta get the money first. Then when you get the money, you get the power. Then when you get the power, you get shot the F*** up at the end of Scarface.

Finding TWO worms in your apple.

www.hurr-durr.com

Steven and Daniel are playing with super soakers in the back yard. Steven says to Daniel: "You can't squirt me!" Daniel says to Steven: "Yes I can!" Daniel is HIV positive.

Aww good to see you looking positive! He said to the boy dying of HIV

what did the dog eat for dinner? food.

69

Your mum's so fat, she attends regular weight loss facilities to lose weight.

what do you call a black man living in Brooklyn making over ten-thousand dollars a week? a hard worker

why did the baby have a hole in its head? it was shot

what did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? we are both lawyers

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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