Why did the blond wreak her car? She stayed up a very long time studying for her mid-term exam, And therefore, was not as attentive to the flow of traffic.

What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

I was gonna tell a gay joke Butt fuck it.

A plane is falling out of the sky, and there is a Priest, a little boy, Obama and a rock star. There are 4 parachutes and everyone jumps out safety.

what rhymes with ham and bread? girl, make me a sandwich

What does it mean when you have big shoes? Either you were genetically born with big feet, or you are wearing sheos that are too big for you.

Fine Nero, but I will be keeping an eye on you.

kill yourself

What's big and green and would probably kill you if it fell out of a tree? A pool table.

What did the guy say when he came out of the closet? Where's my green shirt?

Horse walks into a bar. 'The barman says 'why the long face?' The horse says 'I've got cancer'.

I like the color potato.

Q: What's gray and comes in gallons? A: Gray paint.

DON'T TOUCH MY DUCK, IT HAS A ONE DOLLAR BILL

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? getting your Fallopian tubes ripped out by wolverine

tiger woods played golf against peyton manning and yet tiger still cant win.

Girl look at that body, girl look at that body, I got passion in my pants... Actually I lied, I got a penis and testicles in my pants, but I'm afraid to show it because people might think it's small, sorry

Your momma so poor, she has a hard time paying her bills.

How do you kill an elephant? -With a gun? No, an elephant gun. How do you kill a red elephant? -With an elephant gun? No, with a red elephant gun. How do you kill a blue elephant? -WIth a blue elephant gun? No, you choke it until it turns blue and kill it with a red elephant gun. How do you kill a purple elephant? Theres no such thing as a purple elephant, thus contradicting the reality of performing a major act of animal abuse on it.

Why did Helen Keller become blind and deaf? Because you touch yourself at night

Do cows get breast cancer or utter cancer?

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? A vast quantity of things.

Why did the Police Officer pull over the black man? The black man was not following the rules of the road and accepted the ticket with great remorse. The Officer then proceed to pull over a white man for this very same offence.

A man sees Bill Murray at a restaurant in Los Angeles and tells his friends about the incident. They believe the story, because it is entirely plausible that it actually happened.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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