What did Kim Kardashian say when she got a breast implant? DERP!

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If Hellen Keller could meet Obama, what would she say? Nothing.

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If a tree falls down in the forest and no one is around to hear it, does God exist?

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Evolution is real. Why? Pikachu evolves.

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Where did Sarah go during the bombing? Everywhere.

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Where's my tractor?

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What do you call an Aboriginal in a yellow sleeping bag? An organised man, ready for the harsh winter ahead.

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Q:how do you make a rockstar cry? A: hit him with a breifcase

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If i could re-arrange the alphabet i'd put my sausage in your oven

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Why did the young Mexican apply for a job at McDonalds? The economy is down and his family could use the extra money.

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I DON'T KNOW WHAT WE'RE YELLING ABOUT!!! LOUD NOISES!!!

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Why do midgets laugh when they run? Because the grass tickles there balls

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Thre jews walk into a bar i lied it was a gas chamber

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What is intangible and has every color on the rainbow? A rainbow.

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Why do all black men carry guns? They don't. That is a stereotype. Now pants on the other hand, that's a different story.

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One man's trash is another man's treasure is a horrible way to tell a kid that he's adopted

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Jews are human beings. Pizza is a type of food.

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Why couldn't Gladice get out of bed? Because she was dead!

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What happend when they were 3 guys in the air? They were skydiving

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What is the difference between a lion and a tiger? A lion ,on average, weighs 31 kilograms more.

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Two guys went to a bar, and the bartender said, hey you guys want to hear a funny joke? "Sure" said the guys. The bartender started telling: Anyway, there was this time two guys at a bar, and the bartender said, hey you guys want to hear a funny joke? "Sure said the guys" At this point, the bartender started telling: Anyway, there was this time two guys at a bar, and the bartender said, hey you guys want to hear a funny joke? "Sure said the guys" At this point, the bartender started telling: Anyway, there was this time two guys at a bar, and the bartender said, hey you guys want to hear a funny joke? "Sure said the guys" At this point, the bartender started telling: Anyway, there was this time two guys at a bar, and the bartender said, hey you guys want to hear a funny joke? (when you are done start reading from the top again, and don't stop ever)

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What do you call a three toed 9 foot man. His name.

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How many lemurs does it take to paint a wall It depends on how hard you throw them Why did Jane fall off the swing She has no arms Why did Jack drop his ice cream cone He got hit by a bus Did you know that if you pretend to eat salt you can actualy taste it Do this in public. Why was 6 afraid of 7 Numbers can't think This is the original anti joke A man walked into a bar he is an alcoholic and is distroying his family. Fin a penny pick it up and all the day you will have good luck Until you get hit with a car door. A man is SCUBA diving when he is almost out of air so he takes one breath an holds it to the surface The trip is so long that his lungs explode do to a change in pressure so he died.

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Mel Gibson and a Jew walk into a bar They proceed to have a pleasant conversation and both take taxis home

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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