A mentally disabled person asked a tree, "Are you a tree?" the tree didn't say anything because it can not speak.

orange -banana and lemon say....... i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i want to eat u (RANDOMZZZZZ)

Q : What did the construction worker get for christmas? A: Nothing a building fell on him 3 days earlier

An American, a German, and a Mexican walk quickly into a room. They were late for a work meeting.

Why did Jerry Sandusky appeal his conviction? Because the judge wrongly considered inadmissible evidence.

Roses are red,Violets are blue, I like Tities and so do you

What's the difference between a cow and a Spanish person? To get to the other side

You're always working, why don't you spend some time with your daughter? be a good father. But i already am. We're sleeping together while you work every night.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Who gives a crap?

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

I went to the opticians to get my eyes checked. The optician said "you need glasses".

What does Santa and a grape have in common? They're both purple, except Santa.

What's the difference between a pizza and a black man? It would be cannibalism to eat a black man.

What did the hobo get for Christmas? Nothing

knock knock who's there? rude, interrupting cow rude, interrupting cow who? just kidding, its steve. cows can't talk

dont you love porch monkeys? no.

Why did the man cry when he received his meal at McDonalds? They didn't give him a happy meal.

A blonde rubs a lamp hoping to find a genie that will grant her 3 wishes. It didn't happen.

How do you stop a black man from bleeding? You give him a bandaid. What if he keeps crying? Tell him to stop. What if he cries more? Buy him an ostrich.

Why did the girl fall of the swing? I hit her with an axe.

What do you call a gay scientologist? His first name or last name, depending on how close you 2 are.

What do you call a Mexican? Whatever his name is you racist.

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house No Neither has he.

Why did the woman leave the kitchen? She had finished her breakfast and had to get to her job as a firefighter.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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