How did the woman get pregnant? She was thrown into a pool filled with semen.

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Why did the fat man fall off the swing? Because he weighed 855 pounds and it broke.

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Roses are gray, Violets are gray, I am a dog.

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A jellyfish walks into a bar, the bar doesnt appreciate him, so he retreats back to his jellyfish lands.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? grape. Grape who? Purple grape.

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What did God do to help the little girl with terminal cancer? Nothing, God doesn't exist.

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Why was the woman worried? She was coughing up blood

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What did the hobo get for Christmas? Nothing

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Why can't Jesus eat M&Ms? Because they weren't invented when he was alive.

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Why was Diana crying? Because she was penetrated.

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Dear 6, Please stop spreading rumors about me. I heard you do some pretty nasty things with 9. Sincerely, 7

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How do you make a girl scout cry? Kill her family.

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What's worse than a fake bomb? Do I really have to answer that?

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Roses are red Violets are blue I don't like to rhyme Microwave.

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What did the three year old say when he dropped his milk? Shitting buggery!

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Larchmont Park is the biggest shithole in the european union - Only the jippo part tho, lots of flies live in that part <3

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Republicans

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What did the boy do with his ice cream? He ate it.

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think twice or at least think

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What's red and looks like a bucket? A red bucket.

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Sally went up the hill to fetch a pail of water. She was exhausted and died of dehydration at the top.

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flavin's head

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What's the difference between a baby and a trampoline? I take off my shoes when i jump on a trampoline.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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