Your momma is so fat, shes skinny.

Why did Bob stop at the light? Because it was red and not doing so would be illegal.

Today I wanted to make world peace.... So I killed everyone.

Two scientists walk into a bar The first says “I’ll have some H2O.” The second says “I’ll have some H2O, too.” Both of them receive water because the bartender is not irresponsible enough to serve concentrated hydrogen peroxide as a drink.

What was the blind man doing before he was strangled? He was breathing.

Roses are blu Violets are red Im colored blind

What's brown and sticky? A stick. What's brown, sticky and crawls up your leg? A homesick poo.

Whats the difference between a nigro and a nigro... They are both BLACK!

What came in like a wrecking ball? A wrecking ball.

Why did the camel climb Mount Everest? Actually, he wasn't a camel, he was a very experienced mountain climber. In any case no one really knows why he did it.

Q: Why did the Unicorn cross the road? A: It didn't Unicorns are fictional creatures.

Q: what white hard and huge and it can kill you if you fall out of a tree? A: a refrigerator

How do you stop a baby flying 100mph? a shovel

What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak.

What did Sally want for Christmas? Nothing, she is Jewish.

Two guys went to a bar, and the bartender said, hey you guys want to hear a funny joke? "Sure" said the guys. The bartender started telling: Anyway, there was this time two guys at a bar, and the bartender said, hey you guys want to hear a funny joke? "Sure said the guys" At this point, the bartender started telling: Anyway, there was this time two guys at a bar, and the bartender said, hey you guys want to hear a funny joke? "Sure said the guys" At this point, the bartender started telling: Anyway, there was this time two guys at a bar, and the bartender said, hey you guys want to hear a funny joke? "Sure said the guys" At this point, the bartender started telling: Anyway, there was this time two guys at a bar, and the bartender said, hey you guys want to hear a funny joke? (when you are done start reading from the top again, and don't stop ever)

What do you call a blonde prostitute your bitch

roses are red violets are blue a pyschorapist just ate me refrigerator

Why did the President fall down? He was assassinated. -mattobrado

Why did the plane crash? Because something was wrong with the engine

Q. whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? A. A jew is a human of the jewish religion, and a pizza is food.

A: Why did the chicken cross the road? B: Why? A: If I knew I wouldn't be asking you.

What do you get if you give a black man more than 5 watermelons? Jeff the Killer.

Once upon a time, a duck named Jim went to work, he went up to the steps to his new job and and he was paid all day to sit in a hot tub. Little did he know it was a boiling pot and he was served at Christmas dinner

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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