What's the difference between a Jew and a canoe? One is a type of small aquatic craft, and the other is a human being who practices Judaism.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? A duplicate joke on anti-joke.com in an attempt to get thumbs up. Sad, sad people...

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What's read, round and gets smaller? A baby combing its hair with a potato pearler

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Hey I just met you and this is crazy, I am pregnant and that's yo baby !

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Polly went out for a fag. Then she was raped.

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rose's are red violets are blue I have touretts blblblblblblblblbbl

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was walking.

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why did the bus hit the kid? he dropped his ice cream.

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Is this your pen? I wanna go to school, bye!

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream...?? Because he got hit by a white van

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Knock knock? Who's there? Not Schrodinger's cat, or is it?

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how do you make a little boy cry? Kill his parents in front of him .

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What do you call a black man stealing your tv? A thief

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True or fales? Eddie Izzard.

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What did the deaf-blind kid with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

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how man

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut you racist bastard

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Why are butt pirates butt pirates? Because they just ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR FRUITS

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Knock knock Who's there A gorilla A gorilla who? A gorilla is a ground-dwelling, predominantly herbivorous ape that inhabit the forests of central Africa. The eponymous genus Gorilla is divided into two species: the eastern gorillas and the western gorillas, and either four or five subspecies. They are the largest living primates by physical size. The DNA of gorillas is highly similar to that of humans, from 95–99% depending on what is counted, and they are the next closest living relatives to humans after the chimpanzees and bonobos.

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Why can't Hellen Keller have kids? Because she's dead, therefore does not possess the ability to bear children.

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar.

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Hazel and Gus are two teenagers who share an acerbic wit, a disdain for the conventional, and a love that sweeps them on a journey. Their relationship is all the more miraculous given that Hazel's other constant companion is an oxygen tank, Gus jokes about his prosthetic leg, and they met and fell in love at a cancer support group.

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Knock knock Who's this? Your neighbor Yes can I help you? Hi, I'm new around here, can you help me find the closest gas station? Turn right over there pass 2 traffic lights it will be on your left Okay, thank you You're welcome

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Guy 1: Ask me if I have a banana in my ear. Guy 2: Do you have a banana in your ear? Guy 1: Sorry I can't hear you I have a banana in my ear

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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