go F*** yourself

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Where do you find a pile of dead lawyers? In my basement.

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Q: What do you call 5 white guys sitting on a bench A: The NBA

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A blond walks into an electronics store. Then she promptly walks out, as she got the wrong store.

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What does it mean when you see a bunch of blacks running in one direction? That you need to be more specific.

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A man walks into a bar. He then takes a step back and notices that his head hurts.

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What's worse than having a zit on your face? Getting blue waffle.. google if you don't know what blue waffle is..

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why did the man die? he had cancer

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What gets wetter as it dries? Sarah Jessica Parker

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When life gives you lemons, you should be wondering how "life" managed to give you those lemons.

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How do you stop a clown from laughing? Hit him in the face with an ax.

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what do you call a man with no arms or legs sitting at your doorstep? matt what do you call a man with no arms or legs floating in the water? bob what do you call a man that just had his daughter taken away from him? ...sam

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2 nuns were in a bathtub. One says to the other "Could you pass me the soap please?" The other replies, "What do you think I am, a radio?"

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Man: Would you like to see someone Man 2: Sure Man: How bout the inside of an ambulance

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Want to hear the story about how I got put in prison? So I have an odd bunch of friends: one of them is Polish and he works at a call centre, the other is a slave trader and his name is Richard. We tend to meet outside our Polish friend's house to speak or to do "business" when need be (I run errands for Richard) and the other day that's where I got asked to kidnap an American. "That's strange" I thought, but nevertheless I went out and took the American from his house and carried him over in a sack over to our meeting place. I handed him over and sneaked off as soon as I could, thinking I was home free. But I wasn't. The police turned up all angry like. There were witnesses. Turns out a bunch of kids saw me giving Dick a Yank next to the telephone Pole.

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Whats worse than losing your keys? Your entire family dying in a preventable house fire.

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Its alright for you to act like a bitch but its not allright for me to call u one

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Why did the whale rape a guy? He wanted to see what would happen.

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What/s funnier than 24 dead Jews? 25 dead Jews. What/s funnier than 25 dead Jews? 6 million dead Jews. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

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What's green, grows in my basement, and if fun to smoke? Mold. I lied about it being fun to smoke.

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"Whooaaa Momma." - Says Johnny Bravo

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Roses are red, Viiolets are blue, Get in the gas chamber, You dirty Jew.

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A black man checks his watch. He sees that its 3:50, and calmly carries on with his day.

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THERE'S THE IDENTITY THIEF GET HIM!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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